CONGRATULATIONS! WELCOME TO UNAMERICA!

     

 

 

You're just trying to smear me by associating me with crazy reptoid conspiracists. You big smearer.
-- RatSnatcher

 

 

Wil Shipley Makes Fun of Himself

By El Destino
Pigdog Staff Writer

Wil Shipley posted his own top ten list. "Top 10 Pickup Lines I've Had No Luck With So Far":

  1. You seem smart and beautiful. Imagine how great our kids would be if you marry me right now!
  2. You look like you could fill this giant hole I have in me.
  3. My ex was the perfect woman for me, but don't worry, I don't expect that from you.
  4. Hey, if you have sex with me, you can be in my journal!
  5. I need someone like you in my life. Can I call you every hour and wail about how lonely I am?
  6. I haven't had sex in weeks so I'd say or do anything to get you into bed. But at least I'm honest.
  7. No pressure, but you're the only thing keeping me going since my ex left.
  8. Everyone says I should learn to be my own person, but my plan is to get another girlfriend immediately and not bother with that growing crap. What do you say?
  9. You remind me of my ex when you sit/stand/walk/run/eat/drink/sleep/whatever.
  10. I think I love you, but since I'm on the rebound, who knows for sure?
http://www.omnigroup.com/People/wjs/Ouch/Scab/981213.html

 

 

Over.  End of Story.  Go home now.

fabuloso@pigdog.org


comments powered by Disqus
 
     

 

T O P   S T O R I E S

Sing Us This Song, Piano Man
by Flesh

Giant Space Penises
by Baron Earl

Ted Nelson's Junk Mail
by Baron Earl

Slap Kirk!
by Baron Earl

05-17

Master Squid

Man killed by crossbow in Germany led 'medieval cult'

05-17

El Destino

Crazy bitcoin-trading "seasteader" forced to run by the Thai government

03-30

Flesh

Alex Jones Admits To Being Psychotic.

03-30

Flesh

Alex Jones Throws Temper Tantrum After Being Laughed At.

03-30

Flesh

So what's the time? It's time to get ill! Alex Jones Smokes Some Kind. Gets Really Paranoid

03-23

El Destino

The Las Vegas Strip now has robot bartenders

03-06

Poindexter Fortran

University of California special collections: now with more Hunter S. Thompson

02-15

Baron Earl

Amazing hand-stitched scenes from DUNE

01-17

Baron Earl

Contributions to Top Dark Money Spenders

01-11

Baron Earl

CES claims dildo is not a robot

More Quickies...