El Snatcher
Raised by anacondas in a South American rain forest (or born and
abandoned in a Memphis laundromat, and brought up by Quakers,
depending on whose version of the "truth" you want to believe,)
El Snatcher is Pigdog's fiercest attack journalist, a hillbilly
icon born and bred to unearth diamonds lost in shitpiles and uncloak
Bad People in angelic disguise wherever they lurk.
Three-time winner of the Pigdog "Most Likely to Harbor a Deeply
Personal Lifetime Grudge Award," Snatcher spends his days and nights cloaked
in mystery on Spock Mountain, an enigmatic figure in a blood-spattered
lab coat lurking the labyrinth hallways of his Super Sekrit MegaResearch
laboratory in an undisclosed location, where he performs myriad and inhuman
experiments on all forms of human and whatnot matter. Rumors have it
that El Snatcher lives on a diet that consists solely of broiled and
grilled large meat and fresh beaujolais from his private reserve.
El Snatcher has an undying, pitbull jaw-clamping-like hatred for people
who say things like: "Let's go debunk old granny ESP ladies and laugh in
their faces! HAHA HA We are SO SMARTY PANTY! We did a sting on that
old dowser guy! hahah! Everything not endorsed by Nature magazine
is a fraud!! Let's get them real good, har har! And we're HIPPIES!
We're BAD HIPPIES at the same time!! YaY!! I am a vegetarian skeptic boy
HIPPIE!!! We spy on people with our telescopes while we're barefoot!! And
this is our club. We all LOVE TO LOVE Carl Sagan together in paradise.
Let's watch Star Track and masturbate!! Yay!!"
Pigdog Journal Articles
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Offsite links shared by the author
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2002-11-12
2002-06-20
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2001-03-15
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2001-01-26
2000-12-08
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2000-12-08
2000-10-04
2000-07-16
2000-04-25
2000-04-11
2000-03-10
1999-12-17
1999-12-02
1999-11-19
1999-11-12
1999-11-08
1999-11-05
1999-09-14
1999-08-24
1999-08-24
1999-08-24
1999-08-18
1999-08-18
1999-08-18
1999-08-11
1999-08-11
1999-08-09
1999-08-07
1999-08-05
1999-08-05
1999-07-28
1999-07-27
1999-07-16
1999-07-15
1999-07-15
1999-07-15
1999-07-15
1999-07-15
1999-07-15
1999-07-14
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1999-07-12
1999-07-07
1999-07-03
1999-06-24
1999-06-17
1999-06-16
1999-06-12
1999-06-10
1999-06-08
1999-06-08
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1999-05-30
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1999-05-26

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