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Fuq, okay, so I'm writing this little report while pretty goddamn drunk off of all teh shit that we drank tonight.
-- Crackmonkey

Letters to Pigdog -- Reported 2003-07-08 by Baron Earl
Regurgitations from Pigdog's Readership

The mailbag is full to over-flowing, mostly because we never sit down and post the mail that people send. Most of it is raving crazy Canadistia crapola from some of the most humor-tarded people in the world, some is just plain sad and some of it is just so unintentionally funny we just have to publish it.

o..OOoOo

not ranting


Date: 8 Jul 2003 13:20:35 -0000
From: Lynnda Butler <Butler_L@firn.edu>
To: barfback@pighaven.org

Gee...I am so sorry that you are so uninformed about skunk ownership. Somehow after 32 years of having skunks I can't even find something in your information that suggests that what I have is a skunk. But, we are all entitled to our own opinions....Luckily, yours is in a real minority according to the 1000's of owners all over the US, Canada and Europe. Thanks for sharing. Please feel free to publish my statement.


firn.edu -- Florida Information Resource Network? Don't tell me you found our article researching a paper on skunks? Hope you get an F!


o..OOoOo

Ignorance!


Date: 8 Jul 2003 02:30:16 -0000
From: Pam <Bonniebunny1@aol.com>
To: barfback@pighaven.org

This is the most ignorant piece of trash I have ever seen.....I can only hope this is someone's sick sense of humor!


It's not. WE'RE REALLY, REALLY SERIOUS. (You can tell by our use of CAPITAL LETTERS.)


o..OOoOo

Stupid Canadian Words


Date: 2 Jul 2003 21:55:13 -0000
From: JIm <jm105@canada.com>
To: barfback@pighaven.org

I am Canadian and Im offended by you saying that canadians are stupid

We are the true North and we are Strong and free.

Im Very Proud to Be Canadian.

You need to get a life eh


No, we did not make this letter up.


o..OOoOo

America Sucks


Date: 8 Jul 2003 15:42:20 -0000
From: Kyle
To: barfback@pighaven.org

LOL

You have the biggest load of uncanned bullshit I ever saw in one place, just lying there on a waste of internet space. Third world? Bullshit. Canadia? Bullshit. Youv really got a lot of nerve.

Let me tell you about America.

You know how you Americans think you started and finished WW2 single-handedly? YOU FUCKIN AMERICANS DIDN'T EVEN BOTHER TO CARE ABOUT THE WAR UNTIL THE GERMANS SANK ONE OF YOUR FUCKIN LUXURY CRUISE BOATS! Canada was in there from the start, along with Britain, France, and Turkey. We were out there to help the world. You just wanted it to be over so your precious cruise liners wouldn't feel a scratch. In fact, that's how it was with the other war, too. And though the god damned atom bomb may have ended WW2, it killed plenty of innocent citizens of Hiroshima and Nagasaki. You knew that would happen, but you didn't give a rat's ass.

And at least up here, we have doctors who put saving lives before recieving their paycheck. Down there, you could have a guy who just fell off the Grand Canyon, and still no doctor would even try to save his life without getting a fuckin 100,000 dollar cash sum first. Up here, where we are AS TECHNOLOGICALLY ADVANCED AS YOU PIGS, if someone's dying, we act human. But that's too much to ask of a country where you can't tell a criminal from an innocent bystander, for all the weaponry. When will you get the picture? Guns = BAD. Canada = GOOD. Do you really think that having MORE GUNS around will turn into LESS CRIME? LESS death? LESS of a scare when I come to visit the country?? Hah! You make less sense than a drunk texan.

I also notice that at the bottom of this page you mention laws about free speech. Hate crimes violate free speech laws. You should know that if you're so bright. But even so, if you're not breaking the law, neither am I. You tell lies. I'm telling the TRUTH.

FUCK YOUR EDITORIAL STAFF. as long as someone reads this, no editing is necessary. All I ask is that the manager of the website sees it like it is. So I can tell it like it is.

There are plenty of good things about the U. S. of A., but you are NO BETTER than us. In fact, the rating from the UN is that we hold a higher standard of living than you do. We don't look at a Muslim and think "Terrorist!" We don't fire a gun, and ask questions later. WE didn't get our independence through fighting. If you want to deny any of this, just look back in history.

Write back, so I can see what other bullshit you have to say.

Sincerely,
Kyle

One more thing


Date: 8 Jul 2003 15:45:01 -0000
From: Kyle
To: barfback@pighaven.org

By the way, I don't believe your made up bullshit about making fun of American steriotypes. You must think I'm really dim. You just don't want angry feedback like this. Well fuck you, dumbass.

Sincerely,
Kyle


It's 2003 and Canadian schools still aren't teaching their kids about SATIRE. Maybe we can get a UN program started to ship humor to our deprived northern brethern?


o..OOoOo

More (older) letters...

 

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