Build Date: Thu Jul 18 21:10:18 2024 UTC

Lawyers don't show up in photographs (or mirrors). Why do you think we have to use artists' renderings of trials?
-- S Dallas, Esq

Oliver Green

Oliver Green, aka Ganja Gonzo, is a footloose fool blazing swathes through Asia. He grew up in Egypt's Sinai peninsula and went to school in Indonesia and then found England altogether too tame. After living in Bangkok for five months, saving and working and blazing around on big fuckoff motorcycles, he secured a job with a scabby Thai NGO in Phnom Penh. He is a teacher and does humanitarian relief work too. On weekends and holidays he shoots off into the bush on his Honda Dream to find and explore the jungle-ravaged relics of the lost civilizations of Angkor. He is proud to be a member of the Pigdog team.

Pigdog Journal Articles


Clowns Take on God in Mysterious Annual Ceremony
Last Sunday's (the 6th) Grimaldi Service at a small church in East London was a red-letter day for clowns worldwide. About a hundred old-school red-nosed clowns made the sombre trip to darkest Dalston to pay their respects to clowns who died in the last year and to thank God for the gift of laughter in a bizarre ceremony presided over by the eccentric Reverend Clown Roly, resplendent in a garish red lumberjack shirt with oversized gold lapels.


Bad Demo-Craziness
The tumultuous events in Indonesia have left Megawati Soekarnoputri in the vice-president's seat. Nationalists cheer but sensible people shudder: is she from the same Soekarno family that includes presidents, porn stars, dangerous drunks, phallus-obsessed megalomaniacs and gay dancers? She sure is! So, discarding journalistic integrity, let's take a look at her family to gauge just how dangerously insane she really is.


Australian Troops Set for Days of Debauchery to the Tunes of Kylie Minogue
This weekend Australian troops in East Timor will be able to put their feet up and push all the images of mass graves and charred remains from their minds as they relax to the giddy melodies of Kylie Minogue - including exclusive unplugged performances in the militia-ravaged and blood-spattered border towns of Balibo and Suai.


Dante's Showroom
Charged Pigdog hacks have penetrated the notorious London Arms Fair and penned this cynical and blatant HST plagiarism.


Crazy Drunkard Yeltsin Ruins Kremlin
In a feeble comeback attempt President Yeltsin has redecorated the inside of the Kremlin in a style that the director of the Art Research Institute of the Russian Academy of Sciences describes as "monstrously bad."


Banana Baffles British Boffins
A 500-year-old banana skin has been discovered in London, which predates the earliest recorded arrival of a banana in Britain by 150 years. Archaeologists are stunned by the rogue fruit, which has shattered the conventional wisdom of British banana eaters.


Terror in the Central Market
An innocent trip to the Central Market resulted in a severe attack of arachnophobia (and a meal) when a depraved street kid set her vicious pet spider on an unsuspecting shopper.


The Deep Dark Underbelly of the Star Wars Myth, or Ramayana Remembered
It's a fact: Star Wars is a blatant plagiarism of an ancient Asian legend, and the long lines of devout Star Wars freaks are really unscrupulous Asian copyright busters. From Indonesia to Thailand to Nepal, videos are available for sale or rent before they're even released in the US and UK due to this nerdy camcorder-clutching bunch.


Perilous afternoons at Café Freedom
The most dangerous bar in Phnom Penh is Café Freedom on the west side of Boeng Kak Lake. The number of dangerous things here is great and comes from a whole load of different angles. There's a constant threat of siege by the military police, who are likely to come at any time to apprehend the viciously insane Scottish owner, Brian.


Happy Herb's Bistro
Happy Herb's, as the sharp-minded of you will have guessed, serves ganja and since the Russian market got busted expatriates have had a reasonable excuse to go and munch some herb for supper. Herb also does hash coffees for brekky and will sell you a large Nescafe jar full of weed for a dollar.


The Despicable Farce of Cambodian Justice
Isn't it just shithouse crazy how we have a correspondent in Cambodia? Crazy, but true. Cambodia is still a bad, bad place... and our roving Southeast Asia reporter, Oliver Green, is full of rage, and has the latest scoop on how the Cambodian government is treating its genocidal maniacs -- who seem to be everywhere, living the good life. Quick, look at it now!!!


Shameful Arrests of Good-natured Ganja Ladies in Phnom Penh's Russian Market
PHNOM PENH, Cambodia -- Early on the morning of Friday the 12th, when the Russian market in downtown Phnom Penh was beginning a day of hard sell and fish guts, police arrested seven of the much-loved local ganja ladies when they resisted certain policemen's extortion attempts. Peeved policemen confiscated 38 kilos of ganja without explanation and on tenuous legal grounds.

Over.  End of Story.  Go home now.

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I want to kill bugs, sir!

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