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OK, well, more Pigdog staffers came in with Christmas
wish lists over the weekend. I don't know what these are
supposed to prove, but I'd be remiss not to report them --
if only to publicly record their dreams, so when they're
dashed on 12/25/1999, we can all laugh at them.
Uh, OK, more lists.
Flesh:
- Another chance to do New Orleans. This time w/o a fat
southern pedophile to ruin all the fun.
- Two round trip tickets to Alaska- a month.
- A nice big house on the side of a Mountain.
Thom Stark:
- World peace
- Universal harmony
- Fluffy puppies for all humankind
Thom adds: "Oh..you meant what I REALLY want for Xmas?
Because my needs are simple, there's really only two things:"
- Galactic Domination
- Personal Immortality
Eugene:
- a fully usable (Drexlerian) assembler, with a nice NanoCAD/simulator GUI.
- a library of well-debugged designs for the above
- a bottle of Laphroaig single malt to have a second data point vs Auchentoshan
- a (wearable|implantable) Linux box automagically upgrading itself without breaking anything
- have my H1B visa arrive soonest
- a bottle of a cumulative smart drug which truly deserves the term
- instant godhead toolkit (first point is a good substitute, though)
"Tricky" Rick Moen:
- "I'd like to live just long enough to be there when they cut off your
head and stick it on a pike as a warning to the next ten generations
that some favors come with too high a price. I'd look up at your
lifeless eyes and wave like this."
Rick adds: Actually, most years, surviving Christmas
is gift enough. Life recommences after the 26th.
Crackmonkey:
- A hole so deep that things you drop in it reappear in your
house
- Mountains so tall that they freshen your breath
- A diet soda so delicious that it can cure headaches
- Paper so thin that it can pass through your body unnoticed
- A Guinness so strong that it colors your socks
- Espresso so dark that it causes you to go blind
- An apartment so large that the front door never leads into
the same room twice in a row
- A woman so tender that she crumbles to dust in my hands,
leaving me with nothing but a fond memory of what could have
szithead@pigdog.org
Spock Went, Spock Wrote, Spock Kicked Ass
by JRoyale
Every Labor Day weekend a large portion of the PDJ staff joins 30,000 other freaks at one of the biggest and strangest art festivals in the world - Burning Man - somewhere on the edge of the Black Rock Desert. Our base of operations is always the ultra swank Spock Mountain Research Labs - the World Leaders in Beverage Science and Leisure Technology. This year, we hauled up our computers, printers and a massive digital duplicator, determined to become Black Rock City's third daily newspaper. Even Spock was surprised by our success - news will never be viewed the same on the playa. Read all seven issues of the 2002 Spock Science Monitor for yourself and see why. (More...)
The Lost Probe
by Baron Earl
NASA's Mars missions keep blowing up and crashing, but
dammit, when you reach for the stars you have to expect a
few minor setbacks. Drink a toast to the men and women of
NASA! Toast them with a Lost Probe mixed up with your own
two (or three) hands! (More...)
Light and Time and Bars
by Patient Joab
Patient Joab's scientifick editorial discusses aspect
of the space-time-beer continuum never before processed by
sub-bush-robot minds!!! Too fabulantastic to contempulate! (More...)
The Laughing Swede
by Baron Earl
About 14 years ago when I was on a road trip and stopped in Seattle, I was invited to a party. At this party there were these little tiny glasses sitting in a flat-bottomed bowl of ice. Thin cylinders about an inch in diameter and 4 inches tall, with thick glass at the bottom. Into these were poured frozen AKVAVIT... also known as the water of life. (More...)
Iowa Armageddon
by El Snatcher
Pigdog dispatched special correspondent Ratsnatcher for a
holiday reconnaissance of America's frozen hell. After ten
days of silence, our shortwave radio cackled with
Ratsnatcher's static-filled transmission. (More...)
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