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OK, well, more Pigdog staffers came in with Christmas
wish lists over the weekend. I don't know what these are
supposed to prove, but I'd be remiss not to report them --
if only to publicly record their dreams, so when they're
dashed on 12/25/1999, we can all laugh at them.
Uh, OK, more lists.
Flesh:
- Another chance to do New Orleans. This time w/o a fat
southern pedophile to ruin all the fun.
- Two round trip tickets to Alaska- a month.
- A nice big house on the side of a Mountain.
Thom Stark:
- World peace
- Universal harmony
- Fluffy puppies for all humankind
Thom adds: "Oh..you meant what I REALLY want for Xmas?
Because my needs are simple, there's really only two things:"
- Galactic Domination
- Personal Immortality
Eugene:
- a fully usable (Drexlerian) assembler, with a nice NanoCAD/simulator GUI.
- a library of well-debugged designs for the above
- a bottle of Laphroaig single malt to have a second data point vs Auchentoshan
- a (wearable|implantable) Linux box automagically upgrading itself without breaking anything
- have my H1B visa arrive soonest
- a bottle of a cumulative smart drug which truly deserves the term
- instant godhead toolkit (first point is a good substitute, though)
"Tricky" Rick Moen:
- "I'd like to live just long enough to be there when they cut off your
head and stick it on a pike as a warning to the next ten generations
that some favors come with too high a price. I'd look up at your
lifeless eyes and wave like this."
Rick adds: Actually, most years, surviving Christmas
is gift enough. Life recommences after the 26th.
Crackmonkey:
- A hole so deep that things you drop in it reappear in your
house
- Mountains so tall that they freshen your breath
- A diet soda so delicious that it can cure headaches
- Paper so thin that it can pass through your body unnoticed
- A Guinness so strong that it colors your socks
- Espresso so dark that it causes you to go blind
- An apartment so large that the front door never leads into
the same room twice in a row
- A woman so tender that she crumbles to dust in my hands,
leaving me with nothing but a fond memory of what could have
fabuloso@pigdog.org
Clowns Take on God in Mysterious Annual Ceremony
by Oliver Green
Last Sunday's (the 6th) Grimaldi Service at a small church in East London
was a red-letter day for clowns worldwide. About a hundred old-school
red-nosed clowns made the sombre trip to darkest Dalston to pay their
respects to clowns who died in the last year and to thank God for the gift
of laughter in a bizarre ceremony presided over by the eccentric Reverend
Clown Roly, resplendent in a garish red lumberjack shirt with oversized gold
lapels. (More...)
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by JRoyale
During a magnificent sunny day in a fast receding autumn, the Spock Science Monitor reporters once again blew the playa dust off of their computers and covered the 2002 Burning Man Decompression – held every year just east of Portola Hill in beautiful San Francisco. Both an afternoon and evening issues were released to the unsuspecting crowd of freaks attempting to in some small way experience the euphoria of the playa – if but for a brief afternoon far from the desolation of Northern Nevada. (More...)
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by JRoyale
As has been recently reported in the PDJ, Christopher Walken, evil s00per villain extraordinaire, will be appearing next month in Disney's newest release, The Country Bear Movie. Always playing some wicked and very disturbed badass in movies like Sleepy Hollow, Illuminata, The Prophecy I, II, III, Pulp Fiction, Batman Returns, The Milagro Beanfield War, A View to a Kill, The Dogs of War, Heaven's Gate, and The Deer Hunter, Walken is unsuprisingly a big favorite in the PDJ news room. (More...)
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by Miss Conduct
Well, dear reader, there's no denying it: Spring has sprung. The air is pungent with the fertile aroma of Romance. And you know what goes with Romance, don't you? That's right, Lover, porn. And not just any porn, but the kind you can sing along to. (More...)
Light and Time and Bars
by Patient Joab
Patient Joab's scientifick editorial discusses aspect
of the space-time-beer continuum never before processed by
sub-bush-robot minds!!! Too fabulantastic to contempulate! (More...)
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