Build Date: Sat Sep 30 23:00:33 2023 UTC
Anne Coulter is a character of a parody of a comic book villain. There's no Godwin Law on the intertubes for invoking Coulter, but there should be.
-- Johnny Royale
Patient Joab
Pigdog Journal Articles
2002-01-22
This is not a new link. It is an old link, in need of a little bit more support, folks. It's called "Are You Hot or Not?"
2001-06-08
Does corporate stupidity know no bounds? Recently, AOL Time-Warner purchased Business 2.0, one of those hype-filled new economy rags, to add to its already overgrown, festering pile of fly-fattening media properties.
1999-10-28
So tha folks saw yr tappin' away at the codin' box, and reckoned you'd make more possum hides if you threw all yr meager belongins' on tha truck and hauled yr ass to Sili-kon Valleee. And they were right: you've made out better than Cotton Eye Joe! But, as the old song goes, you got what you wanted but lost what ya had.
1999-06-05
As all you E.T. hunters know by now, Seti@home has just started sending chunks of radio telescope space data out to home computers to scan for messages.
1999-05-23
Patient Joab and his evil cohort, Patient Steve, develop a proposal for the plastic-v.-paper problem that EVERYONE can be happy with. An EXCLUSIVE from Spock Mountain Research Labs!
1999-01-16
Proof that it's going to take a heap of hillbilly ingenuity to find a good home in the post-apocalyptic/Y2K infowarfare age we're all being flung into. Not content with a mere Mobile home, here's a fella who took a 727 and turned it into a right comfy home dwellin'. Complete with in-depth drawings illustrating the difficulties of getting the damn thing down First Avenue and much more.
1999-01-03
Patient Joab's scientifick editorial discusses aspect of the space-time-beer continuum never before processed by sub-bush-robot minds!!! Too fabulantastic to contempulate!
1998-12-30
Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they're not really after you! In fact, many agencies that you never even HEARD OF are keeping detailed dossiers of your mundane life. And they're using S00PER SEKRIT high-tech to do it!
1998-12-24
Want to learn to converse all scientific, like the Spock Mountain Research Labs beverotologists do? Well, tan my hide!
1998-12-24
Here's something to keep you drooling moronic link-clickers entertained for a while: this compendium of stupid, weird, and disturbing postcards is comprehensive and voluminous. Enjoy your drug.
Offsite links shared by the author
2000-05-17
Robot Frank's page. As my friend April puts it, a kind of pre-futurama Bender in real life. Real Funny, though I'm not sure why.
1999-12-09
1999-12-08
T O P S T O R I E S
Gary Busey definitely involved in a hit and run accident
Gary Busey was definitely involved in a hit-and-run accident, but won't face any charges because he's rich and famous. (More...)
Gary Busey allegedly involved in Malibu hit-and-run
"Sir! You hit my car! I need your information!" the woman yelled at Gary Busey driving a battered Volvo station wagon before he sped off. (More...)
Health and Human Services officials spend a year on pot
After a yearlong, comprehensive, thorough, complete investigation into the effects of marijuana usage, Health and Human Services (HHS) officials recommended that it be moved from Schedule I of the Controlled Substances Act to Schedule III, meaning that the HHS no longer considers cannabis to be a drug with high abuse potential and no medical value. (More...)
If you've ever wondered what actual bullshit looks like, just check the back side of Lee Meyers' decommissioned police cruiser. Lee chopped the top of the passenger side of the car off so he could take his full-grown Watusi bull, named Howdy Doody, for joy rides around his home town of Neligh, Nebraska. Since the car doesn't have bathroom facilities Howdy Doody just craps all over the back and side of the car whenever he feels the need to let one go. (More...)
Self-righteous assholes block highway to Burning Man
A group of self-righteous assholes converted exactly zero people to their cause by blocking the highway to Burning Man this week. The group, which used a flimsy trailer, some lengths of chain, and a few folding chairs to block the road, put up signs including "Burners of the World Unite," but none of the burners stopped in traffic wanted to unite with them for anything. (More...)
How much force does it take to pull out nose hair?
Have you ever pulled out a nose hair and felt like part of your brain came with it? Have your eyes watered from the extreme pain? Did you wonder how much force it took? Would you pull out 50 more hairs afterwards, using precise measuring instruments, to determine the answer IN THE NAME OF SCIENCE? (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
Songs Of Love And Special Things
Well, dear reader, there's no denying it: Spring has sprung. The air is pungent with the fertile aroma of Romance. And you know what goes with Romance, don't you? That's right, Lover, porn. And not just any porn, but the kind you can sing along to. (More...)
We here in SMRL's Beverage Research Lab realize that there is more to life than just drinking spocktails. It's important to have other activities. One such activity that we wholeheartedly support is dancing six or more hours to Trance music. So we have designed a drink to accommodate this. (More...)
Paranoid Strippers & Psychotic Crack Dealers (Tales of Christmas Eve)
Christmas day, for the last 17 or so years has bored me. I find that the real fun and excitement always takes place on Christmas Eve. Every other year, it's the excitement of the metaphorical hunt instead of the kill. Otherwise, it's just plain bad craziness. (More...)
What the hell is going on with Sony?
Is anyone else as confused as I am with what's happening with the Sony Playstation network hack? (More...)
All this talk about death, wakes and Moloch recently has, frankly, got me a little worried. What if I'm next to go? I could slip on a wet banana peel and slam my head against an enormous brass statue at almost any time. I'm not planning well enough for this sort of thing. Who will talk for me when this terrible day comes? (More...)
Report from Spiritual Machines
Arkuat gives you the inside scoop on the "Spiritual Machines" panel and conclave. Wacky excitement ensues! (More...)
