You can begin with good smart people and an unbound optimism and in no time at all, everything can disintegrate. Threats and blows can fly; men once tame and meek can bloody the faces of friend and stranger. It's pretty fucking cool.
-- Mr. Bad


Reality Check -- Keeping the Industry Honest

Knowing what a bunch of capitalistic swine you guys are, I'd bet you'd rent that guy the inflatable sheep by the hour. -- Johnnie Royale


Mr. Bad's List -- Reported 1998-12-09 11:15 by Mr. Bad
Quit pointing at me!

This week's list: Bad People

  • the Linux Cabal
  • child molesters
  • the guy who had the idea for "Lion King II"
  • sand painters
  • people who lie on their resume
  • nitpickers
  • Boba Fett
  • white slavers
  • people who gabber on about incessantly about their eBay stock
  • Santa Claus
  • all Geminis
  • hypnotists
  • bill collectors
  • people from Chico
  • buttpickers
  • entrepeneurs
  • liars
  • backstabbers
  • people who give you shitty Christmas presents
  • Rick Moen
  • landlords
  • Nazis
  • grappa drinkers
  • people with megaphones
  • name droppers
  • left-handers
  • people with company slogans in their .sig's
  • newscasters
  • complainers
  • people who don't share their drugs
  • people named "Wil"
  • all Russians
  • database administrators
  • shortchangers
  • absinthists
  • DJs who play "The Hannukah Song"
  • Stanford Business School grads
  • quitters
  • coprophiles
  • S.u.S.E.
  • cat buggerers
  • anyone who ever worked for Oracle
  • ASCII artists
  • tea drinkers
  • collaborators
  • people who wear tank tops
  • two-faced weasels
  • Baha'is
  • organ harvesters
  • triathletes
  • rumor-mongerers
  • people who scratch their crotch while you're trying to talk to them
  • Pacific Bell
  • finger-pointers
  • people who hit you for no reason
  • mountain unicyclists
  • people who don't return phone calls
  • Goths
  • bike messengers
  • anyone who wears Polo shirts
  • anyone who has a Geocities Web site
  • slow bartenders
  • speed freaks
  • porn lords
  • cheapskates
  • Irish rock bands
  • people who don't like Beaujolais
  • German techno bands
  • sellouts
  • Japanese punk bands
  • ventriloquists
  • people who sniff underwear
  • office managers
  • people who shave their head
  • freelancers for W I R E D
  • pig mutilators
  • Kim Rollins
  • pagans
  • people with henna tattoos
  • frotteurs
  • The Night Cabbie
  • people with cable modems
  • farters
  • Ben and Nick
  • people who have robot slaves
  • Paul Guth
  • Smalltalk programmers
  • Italian hackerazzi
  • serial cillers
  • people who misspell "Pigdog"

"Mr. Bad's List" is a column of Pigdog Journal. All rights reserved. All wrongs reversed. Don't be a twat and copy stuff that's not yours.

"Lists are funny." -- Tjames Madison


Over.  End of Story.  Go home now.

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