Build Date: Fri Mar 6 01:50:12 2026 UTC
When it comes to Darwinism, what the hell does fairness have to do with it. Evolution is inherently unfair.
-- Johnnie Royale
Still Up For the Party? America's Dance Floors Are Graying
2000-11-22 12:28:29
Raving over 30 doesn't have to be embarassing anymore.
Once upon a time in my twenties, I could spend two to four nights a week on a dancefloor and still hold a day job.
Now that I've hit 30, I really need some rest.
A recent attempt at re-living my yonder years left me immobile most of Sunday. I forgot what happened on Monday. It was too blurry. I overslept past my alarm on Tuesday. By the afternoon, I was sliding out of my chair. I left work early and canceled evening plans.
Despite these reminders of spinal fluid running dry and bone mass atrophying, I was not alone elder among sprightly youth at that recent San Francisco party.
There, to my surprize, a good portion of the crowd was hardly of the puerile sort.
That leads me to a couple of guesses. Maybe there's an ancient rave culture in San Francisco that never burned out. Could it be that there's a scene so compelling that retiring seems unimaginable?
Okay, maybe that's a stretch. Some of the ancients I met confessed they had actually been really boring and sober until they discovered Paul Oakenfold and ecstasy. One of them said he just happen to be there via a roomate. Some had no idea what they were getting into, but they were told it would be both "tactile" and "visual" - that scantily clad glitter goddesses and fruit fairies would be at their beckon call.
One of my friends who spent most of his teens and early 20s clubbing and getting loaded claims he got it out of his system early. He wouldn't be caught doing it after 30.
"It's a mid-life crisis kind of reaction," he wrote.
While that may be, today's DJs have to deal with the fact that crowds are getting both younger as well as older. The kids may have the time and more bounce in their step, but guess who's got the money? I suspect some parties are trying to cater to these graying customers for fear of alienating the well-heeled.
You can't go to a party anymore without finding a chill-out room for resting the weary bones (in fact, whose even dancing anymore?). More mellow sounds like "Downtempo" and "Dad House" are sneaking into many a DJ mix. Shall we waltz?
Shame on these Republican-like producers! As they grow all the more crusty and dated, they worry that rock blocking BPMs will cause massive brain hemorrhaging or hearing loss.
What they might not realize is that, for most of us, it already has.
Over 25? Decided to give it up? Grab a glowcane and join the Raver Geriatrics list. http://www.raverg.org.

T O P S T O R I E S
The Crossroads are real and The Blues is a place; The enduring myth of Robert Johnson (More...)
California Glory Hole attracts huge crowds
A glory hole at Napa's Lake Berryessa is drawing huge crowds. According to Chris Lee, the general manager for the Solano County Water Agency, the glory hole hasn't been active since 2019, and only restarted operations on Feb 4. (More...)
Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
Republican State Senator Justin Eichorn of Minnesota was arrested for soliciting a teen girl on Monday just hours after he introduced a bill proposing "Trump derangement syndrome" (TDS) as a form of mental illness. (More...)
Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
The parents of a Texas girl who died from the measles are defending their decision not to vaccinate their daughter. "She says they would still say 'Don't do the shots,'" an unidentified translator for the parents said. "They think it’s not as bad as the media is making it out to be." (More...)
Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
"I'm mayor now" said write-in mayoral candidate and founder of Pirate’s Booty Snacks Robert Ehrlich after losing the election for Mayor of Sea Cliff, NY. Then he tried to take over the Village Hall and fire everyone. (More...)
Musk claims Xitter security is staffed by idiots
Earlier this month Xitter experienced a massive outage. In an interview, Musk told Fox Business that he believes the attack came from "IP addresses originating in the Ukraine area." (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
From the mixed up files of citizen 566-77-0776 (More...)
The Liquidation of Hobo Junction
Albany, CA's homeless hooverville by the Bay, "Hobo Junction," is going to be torn down by The Man. Entrances are already being blocked off, and it's now difficult and dangerous to get there. Worse, these obstacles are making it hard to get to the nearby HORSE TRACK on foot. Local historian, Pao Tzu, has an overview of situation. (More...)
Three Days and 25 Spocktails: A Cautionary Tale
Johnnie Royale picked me up from the dental surgery. I felt warm, safe, cradled in the anathesia's loving embrace. The pharmacy downstairs gave me a bottle of Vicodin and a few instructions: take it with food, don't mix with alcohol, don't operate heavy machinery. I put it in my pocket and we left. "Do you want to go home, or do you want to go to a bar?" asked Johnnie. (More...)
The days are getting longer and, as the man says, the nights are getting HOTTER! Lick your finger, touch your ass and go *Tschssh*, cause the damn SUN is out now! And of course that means it's time for a refreshing Spocktail that meets YOUR NEEDS for a delicious booze cooler at affordable prices. (More...)
Canadians Not So Different After All
Nobody wants to be prejudiced. But sometimes you can be biased and not even realize it. I think many Americans are biased in this way against Canadians. I never really stopped to think about it, but I myself used to be this way. I guess I thought that Canadians were "stuck-up" — you know, smarter and better cultured than us. But then I got educated about Canadia. (More...)
During a magnificent sunny day in a fast receding autumn, the Spock Science Monitor reporters once again blew the playa dust off of their computers and covered the 2002 Burning Man Decompression – held every year just east of Portola Hill in beautiful San Francisco. Both an afternoon and evening issues were released to the unsuspecting crowd of freaks attempting to in some small way experience the euphoria of the playa – if but for a brief afternoon far from the desolation of Northern Nevada. (More...)