Build Date: Sat Aug 30 16:50:16 2025 UTC
When 900 years drunk you be... look this good you will not.
-- Johnnie "Yoda" Royale
| O America! -- Reported 1998-12-28 09:00 by Thom "Starky" Stark | |
|
I weep for my country that it has come to such a pass. That we have allowed control of our ship of state to fall into the hands of such small, mean-spirited and short-sighted ideologues is to our discredit as citizens and as electors. That this baying mob of fools and scoundrels should have the temerity to impeach our President in such a mindlessly partisan vote, all the while cloaking its base motives in noble rhetoric, shames us far more in the eyes of the world than does the knavish misconduct of that President. History will not be kind to them for conducting this travesty--and we, their constituents, deserve history's censure for permitting it. I call upon the Senate promptly to reject these petty Articles and harshly to rebuke the House of Representatives for abusing the awesome Constitutional power to impeach with which it is entrusted. Let the senior body swiftly end this national agony and thereby restore some small shred of luster to the reputation of a legislature now so badly tarnished by the conduct of its lower House. And I mourn the once and future greatness of America which has so casually and so thoughtlessly been squandered by those whom we have charged with its preservation and enhancement. These are dark days, indeed. |
T O P S T O R I E S
California Glory Hole attracts huge crowds
A glory hole at Napa's Lake Berryessa is drawing huge crowds. According to Chris Lee, the general manager for the Solano County Water Agency, the glory hole hasn't been active since 2019, and only restarted operations on Feb 4. (More...)
Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
Republican State Senator Justin Eichorn of Minnesota was arrested for soliciting a teen girl on Monday just hours after he introduced a bill proposing "Trump derangement syndrome" (TDS) as a form of mental illness. (More...)
Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
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Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
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Musk claims Xitter security is staffed by idiots
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The Future Ain't What It Used To Be
Ideas have taken horrifying shape and rooted into our modern reality. (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
Spock Went, Spock Wrote, Spock Kicked Ass
Every Labor Day weekend a large portion of the PDJ staff joins 30,000 other freaks at one of the biggest and strangest art festivals in the world - Burning Man - somewhere on the edge of the Black Rock Desert. Our base of operations is always the ultra swank Spock Mountain Research Labs - the World Leaders in Beverage Science and Leisure Technology. This year, we hauled up our computers, printers and a massive digital duplicator, determined to become Black Rock City's third daily newspaper. Even Spock was surprised by our success - news will never be viewed the same on the playa. Read all seven issues of the 2002 Spock Science Monitor for yourself and see why. (More...)
During a magnificent sunny day in a fast receding autumn, the Spock Science Monitor reporters once again blew the playa dust off of their computers and covered the 2002 Burning Man Decompression – held every year just east of Portola Hill in beautiful San Francisco. Both an afternoon and evening issues were released to the unsuspecting crowd of freaks attempting to in some small way experience the euphoria of the playa – if but for a brief afternoon far from the desolation of Northern Nevada. (More...)
My experiment is a failure. Rockstar-and-Robitussin tastes like day-after-Halloween bile. I'm trying to choke down enough to discover the effects, but no matter what those are one thing is certain at the outset: what I have discovered is not a Beverage, but a pale green and angry iced abomination.
You were right: science is not for the weak of will nor stomach. (More...)
It was early in May last year when I first heard about Spock Mountain Research Labs. I was working on a story about a Hungarian scientist's new approach to nucleopeptide synthesis when I got a call from my friend Albert. (More...)
Still Up For the Party? America's Dance Floors Are Graying
Raving over 30 doesn't have to be embarassing anymore. (More...)
What do Computers and Skateboards have in Common?
They both sprang from the mind of John Mauchly that's what. (More...)
