Build Date: Sat Jul 5 17:30:12 2025 UTC
Isn't there something somebody could be bickering about right now?
-- Tjames Madison
IJustGotFired.com
2000-11-12 23:28:19
You read it right, folks -- it's a dot-com to help folks who are the blood cells in the mass hemorrhaging of the Internet economy. Beaujolais, I just got fired!
Seems like everybody I know these days is getting laid off, downsized, or just plain FIRED from dot-com jobs. HELL, in a City where 6 months ago you couldn't wipe your ass without finding a recruiter's business card wound up in the roll, it's seeming like there's more and more E-People (TM) with cardboard signs saying "Will synergize teams for food" on the freeway off-ramps.
[Hey, I just checked -- there's actually an e-people.org out there. BARF! That's just sick. Oh, wait... an epeople.com, too. I think I should just give up with the (TM) satire at this point. Fuck.]
Getting forcibly removed from your job position has all kinds of downsides, besides the obvious ones of not making any money and losing a reliable place to have your CDNow packages sent. Like, FOR EXAMPLE, there's the kinda sticky issue of trying to stay in touch with all those cool people you work with. Your work email address is down, so now what are you going to do?
That's what's hip about IJustGotFired.com. One of the services is an email-forwarding system, so you can choose an address, and it gets sent to your real personal email. I mean, isn't it a lot more styling to send out a mass contact-info email to your former workmates from an address like BurnrateBurnout@IJustGotFired.com rather than Kathy_Simpson@hotmail.com? I think so. Really.
I talked to the IJustGotFired.com folks (who have gone through the firing process recently, and they FEEL YOUR PAIN), and they plan on adding lots of new services -- like downloadable "anti-business" cards with your coolio IJustGotFired.com address on them. Bujholej, say I.
So, go check it out, and tell 'em Mr. Bad (lazyprogrammer@ijustgotfired.com) sent you.
T O P S T O R I E S
California Glory Hole attracts huge crowds
A glory hole at Napa's Lake Berryessa is drawing huge crowds. According to Chris Lee, the general manager for the Solano County Water Agency, the glory hole hasn't been active since 2019, and only restarted operations on Feb 4. (More...)
Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
Republican State Senator Justin Eichorn of Minnesota was arrested for soliciting a teen girl on Monday just hours after he introduced a bill proposing "Trump derangement syndrome" (TDS) as a form of mental illness. (More...)
Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
The parents of a Texas girl who died from the measles are defending their decision not to vaccinate their daughter. "She says they would still say 'Don't do the shots,'" an unidentified translator for the parents said. "They think it’s not as bad as the media is making it out to be." (More...)
Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
"I'm mayor now" said write-in mayoral candidate and founder of Pirate’s Booty Snacks Robert Ehrlich after losing the election for Mayor of Sea Cliff, NY. Then he tried to take over the Village Hall and fire everyone. (More...)
Musk claims Xitter security is staffed by idiots
Earlier this month Xitter experienced a massive outage. In an interview, Musk told Fox Business that he believes the attack came from "IP addresses originating in the Ukraine area." (More...)
The Future Ain't What It Used To Be
Ideas have taken horrifying shape and rooted into our modern reality. (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
Place the Lighter on the Ground and Let Us See Your Hands
So I have been thinking on this whole flag burning issue and all the things it could imply. Now a lot of people right now are saying that there are more important issues at stake and something so trivial is a waste of time. Believing such is really losing sight of some very key changes happening in our nation right now. Being a strict conservative, and currently serving in Iraq, I was surprised to find that I am actually appalled that the House approved a ban on flag burning. (More...)
It was early in May last year when I first heard about Spock Mountain Research Labs. I was working on a story about a Hungarian scientist's new approach to nucleopeptide synthesis when I got a call from my friend Albert. (More...)
We here at Spock Mountain Research Labs (SMRL - world leaders in beverage research and leisure technology) have been noting some complaints about a few of the last Spocktails recipes we’ve released to the general public. Some complaints received to barfback and pigdog-l have centered around the opinion that no one in their right minds would make the drink in question much less consume it. (More...)
Patient Joab's scientifick editorial discusses aspect of the space-time-beer continuum never before processed by sub-bush-robot minds!!! Too fabulantastic to contempulate! (More...)
A Day in the Life of a Beverotologist
It was starting to look like a very boring Saturday, trapped as I was in the suburban wastelands of the outer Bay Area, so I called my Able Assistant (AA) and proposed that we perform some Spocktail field tests. For some time I've been working on creating the quintessential cinematic beverage and even tho' SMRL does most of its testing during nocturnal hours, this seemed an opportune time to roll up the sleeves of our labcoats and get some science done. While the beverotology creation tested this day (The Neurotoxin) must be deemed a success, this article focuses more the journey of the experimenters, rather then the science of beverotology. (More...)
During a magnificent sunny day in a fast receding autumn, the Spock Science Monitor reporters once again blew the playa dust off of their computers and covered the 2002 Burning Man Decompression – held every year just east of Portola Hill in beautiful San Francisco. Both an afternoon and evening issues were released to the unsuspecting crowd of freaks attempting to in some small way experience the euphoria of the playa – if but for a brief afternoon far from the desolation of Northern Nevada. (More...)