Build Date: Sat Apr 20 11:00:03 2024 UTC
The Weird get isolated and destroyed by white blood cells in the Disney bloodstream pretty quick.
-- Mr. Bad
Used Condom In McDonald's Chicken Bun
1998-12-10 05:52:00
It's happened AGAIN... A disgusting foreign object has been found in a value meal. As if McDonald's food wasn't blecherous enough to begin with, a Wisconsin woman recently bit into a McDonald's Chicken Bun sandwich, and almost choked to death on a used condom!
We keep hearing about people finding things in McDonald's fat-laden, fast food products. At least a half-dozen times a year we hear about someone finding a rat claw, bloody Band-Aid, or a screw, etc., in his or her Big Mac, Fish Bun, or whatever. The victims sue for justice, but invariably, once the lawyers zoom in, it turns out that the whole story is a HOAX. This happens EVERY SINGLE TIME. But are all of these people lying? What are the odds!?
SORTA-RELATED-ANECDOTE: One time, in Dayton Ohio, I chomped down on a RUSTY SCREW hidden in a sandwich from Rax Roast Beef. One of their meat-blasting machines must have been loosing pieces or something. When I complained, not only did they NOT replace my sandwich, but they accused ME of being in a conspiracy to defraud them. I should have SUED THOSE BASTARDS!
But would I have had any chance against a mega-corporation fast food chain? Considering that a smart person knows better than to directly go up against these types of wretched corporate mega-scums, how many incidents like this go UNREPORTED? Once can only wonder...
T O P S T O R I E S
In 2010 Dr. Cheng-Huai Ruan discovered a way to cause a patient with an abnormal heartbeat to get back into a normal rhythm by sticking a finger up the patient's ass. (More...)
WKRP in Cincinnati aired from 1978 through 1982. Howard Hesseman played Dr. Johnny Fever, a DJ from Los Angeles who was fired from his previous job for saying the word "booger" on the air. In the show Hesseman would do some dialogue, introduce a song, and start the song. You'd hear a few notes, but never the whole song. (More...)
SF Hippies Can't Get Their Act Together
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Mozart to be inducted into the Rock 'n Roll Hall of Fame
Joining such hard-rocking inductees as Abba, Chet Atkins, Nat King Cole, and Neil Diamond, the Rock 'n Roll Hall of Fame is proud to induct Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart. (More...)
Gary Busey definitely involved in a hit and run accident
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Gary Busey allegedly involved in Malibu hit-and-run
"Sir! You hit my car! I need your information!" the woman yelled at Gary Busey driving a battered Volvo station wagon before he sped off. (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
Paranoid Strippers & Psychotic Crack Dealers (Tales of Christmas Eve)
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The Cross Canadian Ragweed Red Dirt Roundup
Went to one of the only really enjoyable outdoor concerts I can remember (maybe I didn't enjoy it enough). The finest in dirty hillbilly music: The Cross Canadian Ragweed Red Dirt Roundup. For those ignorants, Cross Canadian Ragweed is a horrendous allergan in Texas, and it's also a band. In a great show of humility, CCR was the worst major act in their line up. Fortunately, they have talented friends. (More...)
My dear and close friend, Porn Maven Shannon Mariemont, sent me a titillating message the other day about her new project: the PornOrchestra. Her desire, at most, is to reinvent the porn soundtrack and, at least, to receive a cease-and-desist order like all her cool friends did last year. (More...)
The Walken / Country Bear Conspiracy
As has been recently reported in the PDJ, Christopher Walken, evil s00per villain extraordinaire, will be appearing next month in Disney's newest release, The Country Bear Movie. Always playing some wicked and very disturbed badass in movies like Sleepy Hollow, Illuminata, The Prophecy I, II, III, Pulp Fiction, Batman Returns, The Milagro Beanfield War, A View to a Kill, The Dogs of War, Heaven's Gate, and The Deer Hunter, Walken is unsuprisingly a big favorite in the PDJ news room. (More...)
During a magnificent sunny day in a fast receding autumn, the Spock Science Monitor reporters once again blew the playa dust off of their computers and covered the 2002 Burning Man Decompression – held every year just east of Portola Hill in beautiful San Francisco. Both an afternoon and evening issues were released to the unsuspecting crowd of freaks attempting to in some small way experience the euphoria of the playa – if but for a brief afternoon far from the desolation of Northern Nevada. (More...)
Pigdog brings you SETI astronomer Seth Shostak to bring you the truth about Ay-leens (More...)
