Build Date: Tue Jun 9 03:30:05 2026 UTC
I really hate having to explain my jokes.
-- Johnnie Royale
Used Condom In McDonald's Chicken Bun
1998-12-10 05:52:00
It's happened AGAIN... A disgusting foreign object has been found in a value meal. As if McDonald's food wasn't blecherous enough to begin with, a Wisconsin woman recently bit into a McDonald's Chicken Bun sandwich, and almost choked to death on a used condom!
We keep hearing about people finding things in McDonald's fat-laden, fast food products. At least a half-dozen times a year we hear about someone finding a rat claw, bloody Band-Aid, or a screw, etc., in his or her Big Mac, Fish Bun, or whatever. The victims sue for justice, but invariably, once the lawyers zoom in, it turns out that the whole story is a HOAX. This happens EVERY SINGLE TIME. But are all of these people lying? What are the odds!?
SORTA-RELATED-ANECDOTE: One time, in Dayton Ohio, I chomped down on a RUSTY SCREW hidden in a sandwich from Rax Roast Beef. One of their meat-blasting machines must have been loosing pieces or something. When I complained, not only did they NOT replace my sandwich, but they accused ME of being in a conspiracy to defraud them. I should have SUED THOSE BASTARDS!
But would I have had any chance against a mega-corporation fast food chain? Considering that a smart person knows better than to directly go up against these types of wretched corporate mega-scums, how many incidents like this go UNREPORTED? Once can only wonder...
T O P S T O R I E S
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Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
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C L A S S I C P I G D O G
Paranoid Strippers & Psychotic Crack Dealers (Tales of Christmas Eve)
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What do Computers and Skateboards have in Common?
They both sprang from the mind of John Mauchly that's what. (More...)
There are two kinds of Assmen in this world. Wild, hairy assmen, who put stickers that say things like "Why Be Normal?" all over their trucks and drink Corona beer and wear fezzes at parties for attention; these are the Assman Desperados. Our job is to ferret them out and expose them. (More...)
Hooray! At long last, a NEW Spocktail of the Week! Kid-tested, mother-approved! (More...)
Patient Joab's scientifick editorial discusses aspect of the space-time-beer continuum never before processed by sub-bush-robot minds!!! Too fabulantastic to contempulate! (More...)
