Build Date: Tue Jun 9 03:20:09 2026 UTC
Anne Coulter is a character of a parody of a comic book villain. There's no Godwin Law on the intertubes for invoking Coulter, but there should be.
-- Johnny Royale
Crazed Otters Terrorize Mankind
2001-05-17 18:11:49
Otters! The latest in a string of bizarre and unexplained attacks rocks humankind. From Florida to Romania, one word is striking terror in the hearts of humans everywhere. Otters! Otters!
Dateline: Romania. An innocent fisherman in a sleepy hamlet hauls in a fish. The otters attack. The crafty mammal sneaks up on its prey, then sinks its otter teeth into his fleshy Romanian buttocks. Though the catch represented the biggest fish the fisherman had ever seen, the otter sprang its aquatic companion from the human captor, in an apparent them-versus-us show of solidarity.
It's a troubling development, conjuring nightmarish images: armies of otters rampaging through our wildlands, like some horrible campfire ghost story come true. It resonates on a primitive level, a surreal and haunting message about the inherent futility of man's aspirations. You hope, you dream, you plan for the future -- and then an otter bites you in the ass. You're realizing your pathetic small-town glory of lifting the largest fish you've even seen in your life from the local lake -- and then an otter bites you in the ass.
Pigdog's ongoing reporting of animal rampages has uncovered the disturbing pattern. (Otters!) From squirrels to skunks, seals to sqrats, the crazed animal uprisings in an undeclared guerilla war may now be signalling an escalation. " Crazed otter drowns fluffy dog" was only the beginning.
It all buttresses something Pigdog's editors concluded long ago. "The dirty little secret of the Animal Kingdom is that ALL ANIMALS HATE US.
"Even the cute ones. So watch your back!"
T O P S T O R I E S
America's National Recording Registry Inducts Culturally Significant Artist - Weezer!
America's Library of Congress calls them "defining sounds of history and culture" and "audio treasures worthy of preservation for all time based on their cultural, historical or aesthetic importance in the nation’s recorded sound heritage." Ladies and gentlemen, I give you... Weezer! (More...)
The Crossroads are real and The Blues is a place; The enduring myth of Robert Johnson (More...)
California Glory Hole attracts huge crowds
A glory hole at Napa's Lake Berryessa is drawing huge crowds. According to Chris Lee, the general manager for the Solano County Water Agency, the glory hole hasn't been active since 2019, and only restarted operations on Feb 4. (More...)
Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
Republican State Senator Justin Eichorn of Minnesota was arrested for soliciting a teen girl on Monday just hours after he introduced a bill proposing "Trump derangement syndrome" (TDS) as a form of mental illness. (More...)
Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
The parents of a Texas girl who died from the measles are defending their decision not to vaccinate their daughter. "She says they would still say 'Don't do the shots,'" an unidentified translator for the parents said. "They think it’s not as bad as the media is making it out to be." (More...)
Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
"I'm mayor now" said write-in mayoral candidate and founder of Pirate’s Booty Snacks Robert Ehrlich after losing the election for Mayor of Sea Cliff, NY. Then he tried to take over the Village Hall and fire everyone. (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
Report from Spiritual Machines
Arkuat gives you the inside scoop on the "Spiritual Machines" panel and conclave. Wacky excitement ensues! (More...)
Paranoid Strippers & Psychotic Crack Dealers (Tales of Christmas Eve)
Christmas day, for the last 17 or so years has bored me. I find that the real fun and excitement always takes place on Christmas Eve. Every other year, it's the excitement of the metaphorical hunt instead of the kill. Otherwise, it's just plain bad craziness. (More...)
It was the night of the Leonid meteor showers -- the perfect opportunity to break out the evil opaline liquor, get madder than hatters, and test wireless ethernet hardware... Would the plunging meteorites interfere with the 2.4GHz band? What about our delicate brain waves? (More...)
Spock Went, Spock Wrote, Spock Kicked Ass
Every Labor Day weekend a large portion of the PDJ staff joins 30,000 other freaks at one of the biggest and strangest art festivals in the world - Burning Man - somewhere on the edge of the Black Rock Desert. Our base of operations is always the ultra swank Spock Mountain Research Labs - the World Leaders in Beverage Science and Leisure Technology. This year, we hauled up our computers, printers and a massive digital duplicator, determined to become Black Rock City's third daily newspaper. Even Spock was surprised by our success - news will never be viewed the same on the playa. Read all seven issues of the 2002 Spock Science Monitor for yourself and see why. (More...)
Juggler Vain attempts to wrestle with the issues around the KPFA shutdown; Big-time wrestling ensues. (More...)
Our man Daemon Agent checks out the heavy heavy sounds of crazy space surf rockers Man or Astroman?. (More...)
