Celebrity endorsement impersonated

     
 

I Hate the Information Age
2003-02-04 00:24:44


Consumers in Action
 
Your denial is beneath you, and thanks to the use of hallucinogenic drugs I see through you.
-- Bill Hicks

 

I bought myself a cell phone for Christmas so that I could send private little text messages back and forth with my boyfriend. Generally I can't stand the idea of being reachable anytime, anywhere, day or night. But who am I to impede the progress of love? So, I knuckled under and took advantage of this great AT&T "Free-2-Go" Wireless and Nokia offer at my local 7-Eleven store. Now, I'm all fired up.

The original offer entailed buying the $99 phone which included $50 mail-in rebates from AT&T and 7-Eleven respectively. I was suspicious because, well, nothing is free, right? But the deal came highly recommended by a trusted friend. I would buy the phone, mail in the rebate information and just pay for the phone minutes. Voila! Free phone. It was a pretty good deal. No contracts or commitments. I was comforted in knowing that if I got real pissed off at my new shoe phone, I could toss it from a moving vehicle--no muss no fuss. I diligently assembled the necessary rebate information and mailed it the very next day. Yay. Merry Christmas to me.

Today I received an envelope from some company named Young America. It contained my original envelope, receipt, rebate form and a letter advising that my request was incomplete. I apparently neglected to include the bar-code sticker from the bottom of the box. Now, I don't remember if the original instructions asked for this information or not. I'm inclined to think that they didn't because I'm fairly detail oriented and thorough. Plus, I checked all the information twice before mailing it off.

But that's not the point. They were kind enough to allow me to resubmit my request with the admonition that my "...resubmittal will be subject to all of the original terms and conditions of the Nokia/AT&T Q4 2002 Mail-In Rebate Offer." The point is that they waited almost TWO MONTHS before notifying me of the alleged oversight: well AFTER the deadline to submit the rebate request! I mean, it's not like they didn't have my phone number. fu*kers. There is a chance that they will honor my request since the AT&T Wireless Website is currently offering the same deal. But I'm still fired up and they're still f*ckers.

What about the 7-Eleven part of the rebate, you may ask? They lamed out on the whole thing and sent me an innocuous letter enclosing a $25 prepaid refill card for calling minutes. No $50. No opportunity to re-submit my request. I hate AT&T. I hate Nokia. I hate 7-Eleven. (Well, okay, I'm extremely disappointed with 7-Eleven.) I hate the Information Age. I don't want to be in touch. I don't even like talking on the phone. Don't call me. Don't even look at me. fuck*rs.

Dog gone it! I want my $100.

Over.  End of Story.  Go home now.

xxxlover@pigdog.org


comments powered by Disqus
 
     

 

T O P   S T O R I E S

Eavesdropping on Geeks: 'Star Trek: Discovery' vs 'The Orville'
by Thom 'Starky' Stark, Lenny Tuberose, 'Tricky' Rick Moen, Destino

The One Trump Conspiracy That Will Explain Everything
by El Destino

No, Google Isn't Using Grand Theft Auto To Train Self-Driving Cars
by El Destino

Amazon's 'Dash' Button For Doritos Panned By Potheads
by El Destino

10-09

El Destino

Frank Sinatra told Donald Trump to "go fuck himself"

07-05

El Destino

Whatever happened to JenniCam's Jennifer Ringley?

05-03

El Destino

Iíve Made Millions Selling Fake Plastic Hillbilly Teeth

05-03

Baron Earl

Fyre Fest Lawsuit

05-03

Baron Earl

US Government uses drones to shoot M&Ms at endangered ferrets

05-03

Baron Earl

When will the abuse of airline passengers stop?

05-03

El Destino

Hillbilly miner turned coder wants to make Kentucky into "Silicon Holler"

03-31

El Destino

86-year-old William Shatner cast in a new romantic comedy: 'Senior Moment'

03-19

El Destino

New ransomware taunts its victims with ASCII art of Spock and Kirk

01-26

Flesh

Alex Jones is Big, Fat, And Drunk in Public.

08-01

El Destino

Amazon's secret: incest in the Kindle ad?

08-01

El Destino

Slut Walk! Sexy feminist protest, or invaders from Mars?

04-25

Daemon Agent

The Quest for the Best Cheap Beer in a Can

04-25

Eugene Leitl

Beverage science at its finest

04-16

El Destino

YouTube punishes copyright offenders with animated pirate cat

04-09

Baron Earl

Poll shows that almost half of Mississippi's Republicans think interracial marriage should be illegal

04-07

Baron Earl

Commodore64 redux - now with Linux

04-06

El Destino

George Takei demonstrates why he should be playing Spider-Man

04-01

El Destino

High school students sacrifice chickens to improve their batting average

03-31

Baron Earl

Creating a wall-hangable computer from an Ikea shadow box frame

More Quickies...