Build Date: Fri Jun 13 10:50:16 2025 UTC
WE WILL ARGUE ABOUT X-WINDOWS UNTIL THE PYRAMIDS ARE 3 FEET HIGH!
-- Ratsnatcher
Alien Baby Rushed to Hospital!
1999-11-05 11:07:02
OK, so no one really thought it was an Alien, they actually thought it was a human foetus. But it was actually an Alien! OK, it was actually a plastic alien toy. But it was really gross!! No one can say it wasn't really gross! It was slimy and metallic and had big ears, it's also expected to be one of this Xmass's biggest hits! And have I mentioned the British are really weird?
OK, I should probably take a moment to explain that I already wrote this article yesterday, and it was beautiful and melodious and used a short, concise sentence structure. But that version was lost in a rip in the space/time continuum so you'll just gots t' deal with this one. So here are the basic points I made in that first article:
- Janitor find little slimy thing, thinks it's a human foetus.
- Police close train station as possible crime scene an rush little slimy thing to hospital for autopsy.
- Doctors realize it's a plastic alien toy.
- Toy is very popular in England.
- British drink to much on their lunch breaks
- British kids are real gross for wanting little slimy things for Xmass.
the end.
T O P S T O R I E S
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Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
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Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
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Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
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Musk claims Xitter security is staffed by idiots
Earlier this month Xitter experienced a massive outage. In an interview, Musk told Fox Business that he believes the attack came from "IP addresses originating in the Ukraine area." (More...)
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C L A S S I C P I G D O G
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The Ancient and Correct Sake Ceremony
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Pigdog dispatched special correspondent Ratsnatcher for a holiday reconnaissance of America's frozen hell. After ten days of silence, our shortwave radio cackled with Ratsnatcher's static-filled transmission. (More...)
We here in SMRL's Beverage Research Lab realize that there is more to life than just drinking spocktails. It's important to have other activities. One such activity that we wholeheartedly support is dancing six or more hours to Trance music. So we have designed a drink to accommodate this. (More...)
Patient Joab's scientifick editorial discusses aspect of the space-time-beer continuum never before processed by sub-bush-robot minds!!! Too fabulantastic to contempulate! (More...)
