Build Date: Mon Apr 20 03:40:21 2026 UTC
As a writer, I kick your flabby ass to China and back. Your articles are rolling over and BEGGING my articles not to tear through their soft underbellies and slurp up their intestines like so much spaghetti. Your articles call my articles "sir." Your articles pull their dripping assholes WIDE for my articles' slightest pleasure.
-- Siduri
Michael Bakunin
Bakunin was born of an aristocratic family in the village of Pryamukhino (Прямухино) between Torzhok (Торжок) and Kuvshinovo (Кувшиново), in Tver guberniya, northwest of Moscow, in the spring of 1814. At the age of 14 he left for St. Petersburg where he was given military training at the Artillery University. On completion of his studies in 1832, he was commissioned as a junior officer in the Russian Imperial Guard and sent to Minsk and Gardinas, Lithuania (now Belarus). Though his father wished him to continue in either the military or civil service, Bakunin abandoned both in 1835 and fled to Moscow, where he hoped to pursue the study of philosophy.
Pigdog Journal Articles
2008-02-18
It's not prior restraint, because you can just memorize http://88.80.13.160/
2007-07-17
A DynCorp security employee watches over the A.E.F. destroying poppy fields in Uruzgan.
2007-05-28
John Yoo has my undying respect. Anyone who can make John Ashcroft into a defender of liberty is an evil genius of the first order.
2007-05-14
If Homeland Security didn't keep shooting Haldol in my ass, I might be a better person.
2007-04-18
I am offensive to the point of insulting. I am chief of staff to the Deputy Attorney General. I have taken a personal leave from the Justice Department!
2007-04-13
So I go to CVS to buy the personal lubricant, for the chicken..
2007-04-08
George W. Bush: glorify his name or we'll steal your luggage.
2007-04-03
..because if you wear black, the FBI will detain and question you. Seriously. No joke.
2007-03-25
..but if we show you these documents we will be embarrassed when you discover how tiny our weenies are.
2007-03-24
What kind of asshat gets a boner reading Kafka?
2007-01-30
The Department of Information Retrieval meets the Office of the Vice President.
2007-01-27
No documents ever get lost, the court forgets nothing.
2007-01-21
I miss the days when "Kafkaesque" was a literary adjective.
2007-01-14
Banal, perhaps, but never boring: your Pentagon and her National Security Letters!
2007-01-13
The wiretapping in the army, they say is mighty fine..
2006-11-29
Oops.
2006-11-16
That's it.. taser me there.. mm.. right there.. uh.. that's the spot.. oh.. taser me again, baby!
2006-10-20
The CIA are not the good guys.
2006-06-10
Anyone can dump a couple of Mentos into a 2-liter of Diet Coke for fun. It takes sheer genius to turn it into artistry.
2006-06-06
Mm, monkey chow. Or rather, mm, ZuPreem Primate Dry Diet Animal Food.
Offsite links shared by the author
2007-08-26
2007-08-26
For daring to report illegal arms sales, Navy veteran Donald Vance says he was imprisoned by the American military in a security compound outside Baghdad and subjected to harsh interrogation methods.
2007-08-14
The address is 611 Folsom Street in downtown San Francisco. To be more precise, it’s in a tightly guarded, access restricted room: Room 641A. There’s a loud sucking sound coming out of this room. It’s the sound of the United States Constitution going down a rat hole.
2007-08-13
Whether plaintiffs were subjected to surveillance is a state secret, and information tending to confirm or deny that fact is privileged.
2006-11-13
My name is Abdur Sayed Rahman. Abdur Zahid Rahman was the deputy foreign minister of the Taliban. I was taken to this camp and they began to interrogate me. An American told me I was wrongfully taken and in a couple of days I would be free. I never saw this American again. I'm still here.
2006-10-01
Stuff like this makes me want to believe in hell, which is not what an atheist likes.
2005-12-01
Holy doorstop, Batman!
2005-11-28
If you must be a whore, go out with class.
2005-11-16
Yes, that's right -- if you notice that you're being followed and head to the police to report it, the FBI following you will arrest you, ignore the assistant DA's instructions not to charge you, and stash you in jail for half a week. For, er, nothing. 'Cuz they suck. Weenies.
2005-11-15
Everything you always wanted to know about les banlieues populaires but were afraid to ask.
T O P S T O R I E S
The Crossroads are real and The Blues is a place; The enduring myth of Robert Johnson (More...)
California Glory Hole attracts huge crowds
A glory hole at Napa's Lake Berryessa is drawing huge crowds. According to Chris Lee, the general manager for the Solano County Water Agency, the glory hole hasn't been active since 2019, and only restarted operations on Feb 4. (More...)
Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
Republican State Senator Justin Eichorn of Minnesota was arrested for soliciting a teen girl on Monday just hours after he introduced a bill proposing "Trump derangement syndrome" (TDS) as a form of mental illness. (More...)
Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
The parents of a Texas girl who died from the measles are defending their decision not to vaccinate their daughter. "She says they would still say 'Don't do the shots,'" an unidentified translator for the parents said. "They think it’s not as bad as the media is making it out to be." (More...)
Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
"I'm mayor now" said write-in mayoral candidate and founder of Pirate’s Booty Snacks Robert Ehrlich after losing the election for Mayor of Sea Cliff, NY. Then he tried to take over the Village Hall and fire everyone. (More...)
Musk claims Xitter security is staffed by idiots
Earlier this month Xitter experienced a massive outage. In an interview, Musk told Fox Business that he believes the attack came from "IP addresses originating in the Ukraine area." (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
Spock Went, Spock Wrote, Spock Kicked Ass
Every Labor Day weekend a large portion of the PDJ staff joins 30,000 other freaks at one of the biggest and strangest art festivals in the world - Burning Man - somewhere on the edge of the Black Rock Desert. Our base of operations is always the ultra swank Spock Mountain Research Labs - the World Leaders in Beverage Science and Leisure Technology. This year, we hauled up our computers, printers and a massive digital duplicator, determined to become Black Rock City's third daily newspaper. Even Spock was surprised by our success - news will never be viewed the same on the playa. Read all seven issues of the 2002 Spock Science Monitor for yourself and see why. (More...)
It was early in May last year when I first heard about Spock Mountain Research Labs. I was working on a story about a Hungarian scientist's new approach to nucleopeptide synthesis when I got a call from my friend Albert. (More...)
WE'RE STILL TOTAL LOSERS JESUS
Mr. Bad, Tjames Madison, and various other Pigdoggers of all stripe take on the makers of JERKCITY in a PIGDOG INTERVIEW DEATHMATCH. (More...)
Three Days and 25 Spocktails: A Cautionary Tale
Johnnie Royale picked me up from the dental surgery. I felt warm, safe, cradled in the anathesia's loving embrace. The pharmacy downstairs gave me a bottle of Vicodin and a few instructions: take it with food, don't mix with alcohol, don't operate heavy machinery. I put it in my pocket and we left. "Do you want to go home, or do you want to go to a bar?" asked Johnnie. (More...)
Report from Spiritual Machines
Arkuat gives you the inside scoop on the "Spiritual Machines" panel and conclave. Wacky excitement ensues! (More...)
Pigdog dispatched special correspondent Ratsnatcher for a holiday reconnaissance of America's frozen hell. After ten days of silence, our shortwave radio cackled with Ratsnatcher's static-filled transmission. (More...)
