Build Date: Wed Sep 11 00:30:25 2024 UTC
Parse does not the above.
-- Doctor Obnox
Power Corrupts
Politics is an ugly business, which is what the Pigdog Journal does best.
Pigdog Journal Articles
2020-05-05
Maryland officials are looking into whether or not a company named after the colloquial term for lighting fart gas on fire is nothing but a scam.
2017-12-15
"I'd finally found Arkuat. Locked in a remote cabin, he was scrawling out his manifesto, where beer bottles shimmered over scattered bits of technology. I'm pretty sure he was building exploding duck decoys..."
2007-03-25
..but if we show you these documents we will be embarrassed when you discover how tiny our weenies are.
2007-01-30
The Department of Information Retrieval meets the Office of the Vice President.
2006-02-23
Secret Service Agents have reportedly stated that Vice President Dick Cheney was drunk at the time he shot Harry Whittington on a hunting trip two weeks ago. The day and a half delay in letting law enforcement onto the ranch to interview the hunting party gave the group plenty of time to sober up.
2003-02-26
So, it's another Virtual March on Something -- this time on Washington, what with the INCIPIENT BLOODBATH coming any day now. The folks at Win Without War are organizing a big-ass mass-calling-mailing-faxing dealy, and you should be part of it, if only to cause mayhem and get people pissed off at you.
2003-01-17
As the Bush Administration continues to bang the drums of war while moving hundreds of thousand of troops to the Middle East, millions of Americans are questioning why. Why are we going to war with Iraq? Is it because of oil? Is it because of terrorism? Is it because of weapons of mass destruction? Is it because Saddam is an evil-doer? Does he smell bad? Is it because he embarrassed the Bush the First? Just what’s the beef, dude?
2003-01-13
With an estimated 35 Billion (that's a illion with a "B") budget deficit looming over the state of California, Gov. Gray Davis has been forced to slash just about every conceivable program in existence to meet the state’s constitutionally mandated balanced budget requirement. Every program regardless of merit, from schools, to roads, to agricultural advertising campaigns in Central Africa will share the pain. Every program that is, except the Department of Corrections.
2002-11-01
In a crushing blow to the freedom of the Internet, ICANN voted Thursday to permanently close elections to its board of directors, thus clearing the way for a small group of individuals to control the entire Internet DNS system with little or no oversight or accountability.
2002-10-03
In an abrupt change from last year's policy, the selected Bush Administration is now considering vaccinating all 280 million Americans against smallpox. Unfortunately, this vaccine is not foolproof and 1 or 2 people per million will die when they are inoculated.
2002-04-23
Over the past few weeks the Israeli press and government spokespeople have repeatedly reminded the world of the parallels between Europe of the 1930s and the modern Western world.
2002-04-19
The Oil Companies attempt to gain corporate control to the ANWR through their private governmental subsidiary located that 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue failed miserably today as the Oil Barons were unable to even muster a simple majority to get the bill on the floor of the Senate.
2002-04-18
Donald Rumsfield has stated that the creation of a military command whose sole mission is to defend American territory will not erode legal limits on using federal troops inside U.S. Borders. Please note that the federal government has an exciting way of using the word "not." Some fun examples: Income tax will be a temporary 2% tax and will *not* remain after it is needed, Social Security Numbers will *not* be used to uniquely identify and track U.S. Citizens, the recently created and disbanded military Department of Lying to the Press will *not* be used to lie to the press, and Census information is confidential and will *not* be handed over to law enforcement agencies for pursuing individuals. Not. I love that word.
2002-04-18
Two terms I've seen recently that have caught my attention: "E-government" and "Identity Theft." It looks like Mark Forman has recently declared that they're considering using Microsoft Passport technology to identify citizens. Why do I find this less than comforting?
2002-04-18
US Attorney General John Ashcroft quest to cripple Oregon's Right to Die Law suffered a serious set back yesterday as a Federal Judge ruled that John Ashcroft and the United States government had no legal reason to prevent doctors in Oregon from distributing drugs that allow terminally ill patients to end their lives.
2002-04-07
Everybody knows that US needs more oil, especially since the Bush Administration simply REFUSES to either mandate improved energy efficiency or more importantly, invest in any sort renewable energy technologies. So sooner or later we are gonna run out of oil and the Bush Administration has a plan to make that date little latter then sooner.
2002-03-17
Ever since the Supreme Court selected our current half-wit President, an ill wind has whipped this noble attempt at self-government, straining our will to persevere and chilling our resolve. Large and very duplicitous forces are conspiring to reduce this nation into a bunch of mindless morons, braindead zombies and marketing whores, incapable of anything more then unquestioning obedience to the dictums of our self-anointed rulers. Don't believe me??? Just look at the Ins and Outs of 2002 and tell me things haven't gone from bleak to horrible lately.
2002-03-17
Our Commander in Chief recently named an "Axis of Evil." But the real danger is his own Axis of Stupidity.
2002-03-02
In a screeching rant that would make any PDJ author proud, Thom Greene of The Register rips into Senator Hollings (D - SC) and his ludicrous "dog and pony" SSSCA hearings Hollings held early this week.
2002-02-27
Our selected President, George W. Bush, announced his plans for welfare defor. . . I mean reform. The cornerstones of this administration's proposed policies, which are to be piled on top of the already horrific Clinton era "reforms", are work and "family formation." In typical "Republican Stormtrooper" fashion and following very nicely in the wake of the "War on Terror", the GOP is once again launching an assault on the poorest of the poor here in the Good Old US of A, all while claiming these draconian measures are for their own good.
2001-11-11
Immediately following the fiasco of the Florida Presidential elections late last year, many of the top news organizations in the lull that occurred between Clinton's dick and the apocalypse of 9-11, funded a study to recount the votes in Florida.
2001-10-31
Now I'll admit to being somewhat hung over after dinner and a lot of drinks at some friends' house last night. But upon viewing the news of the House-passed "economic stimulus package," I had to run to the bathroom for session of deep, passionate, oral worship with my toilet.
2001-10-16
As if things aren't weird enough these days, it seems that the one million dollar audit of the Florida presidential vote that the major news services paid will not be picked up.
2001-08-19
If you've been paying attention for these last few weeks, you know by now that the Digital Millennium Copyright Act (DMCA) is a rotten piece of law with over-zealous, unconstitutional restrictions on researchers. Finding a flaw in some company's copy protection software, or discussing that flaw in public, could land you in jail. Not content to wreck the U.S. Constitution, Hollywood's lawyers are now trying to incorporate the DMCA's restrictions into international law by getting its provisions added to the Free Trade Area of the Americas (FTAA) treaty.
2001-08-08
You can't have political dissent without a MIDI playing Devo's "Whip It." See George W. Bush! Dancing! In a tutu! In blue boxer shorts!
2001-08-04
On MONDAY, AUGUST 6TH, Dmitry Sklyarov will be given a bail hearing in a San Jose courtroom. Here's what you can do to help get Dmitry set free...
2001-07-28
Still more protests demanding the release of Dmitry Sklyarov are scheduled for MONDAY, JULY 30TH, around the country. Protests will be happening in San Francisco, Boston, Chicago, Los Angeles, Minneapolis, New York, and Seattle.
2001-07-26
After Monday's demonstrations, Adobe has decided that it no longer wishes to see Dmitry Sklyarov in prison. However, since the charges against him are criminal, not civil, the feds are keeping Dmitry on ice for now.
2001-07-22
Dmitry Sklyarov wrote a clever piece of software which showed that the encryption system used by Adobe software doesn't protect anyone's confidential information. Rather than fix the problem with their software Adobe chose to have Mr. Sklyarov arrested under a provision of the Digital Millennium Copyright Act, which makes it a crime to demonstrate flaws in copyright protection schemes.
2001-06-03
The first impression I got of George W. Bush was that his campaign had tried to reserve every single domain name that might sound like a criticism of him. "bushsucks.com" and whatnot all pointed to his campaign stuff. "Here," said I, "is a man who will eventually become outraged at the press and do something scary like that Comidus guy in Gladiator." Only Gladiator wasn't out yet, I think.
2001-01-24
15,000 angry Americans protested the Bush inaugural cermonies, just in San Francisco, the local paper reported. Six Pigdog Journal staffers were on the scene...
2000-11-21
We all know about soon-to-be-president Bush's coke-snorting, drunken, frat-boy past. But Larry Flynt, a man not afraid to get down into the cesspool and pull up skeletons buried Mafia-style has some new evidence.
2000-11-13
Ya know, one of the great things those on the margins of American politics is that they at least know how to fucking mount a protest. Like those WTO protestors in Seattle. They sure raised a HELL of a ruckus.
2000-11-10
The Rev gives it to you like it is: election day blues.
2000-11-09
So check this out: This feller at CMU has done some VERY SIMPLE statistical analysis on voting patterns in Florida. And apparently either there's a lot of complete nutbag Nazi freaks in Palm Beach County, or something went wrong with that notorious ballot.
2000-11-09
Democrats have secret weapon in race for President.
2000-11-07
The Washington Post today calculated that the amount of the money raised by politicians for the upcoming election will over 3 Billion Dollars. GAG!
2000-10-31
This site is for all you liberals who are just too afraid of Bush to vote for Nader.
2000-10-27
Ok, so this isn't such a big surprise. Moore is like this super big, super old time progressive.
2000-10-26
Ever wonder how your favorite (or least favorite) PDJ editor is gonna vote come this Nov 7th. Well, we'll tell ya.
Offsite links shared by staff writers
2019-01-17
2006-10-01
Stuff like this makes me want to believe in hell, which is not what an atheist likes.
2004-06-20
2003-01-28
This would explain just about everything.
2002-04-11
Now make NO mistake, these caribou will be held accountable (Flash)
2001-07-28
2001-07-28
2001-04-04
2001-02-15
2001-01-24
2000-11-11
2000-11-09
I have to admit that this is particularly satisfying.
T O P S T O R I E S
Another Nobel Prize-Winning Author Describes Drunkenness
This book won a Pulitzer Prize. Here's its famous paragraph on getting drunk... (More...)
'Why I'm pretty sure JD Vance had sex with a couch'
True or false? The answers await us in that magical land where all truths are revealed -- the internet. (More...)
In 2010 Dr. Cheng-Huai Ruan discovered a way to cause a patient with an abnormal heartbeat to get back into a normal rhythm by sticking a finger up the patient's ass. (More...)
WKRP in Cincinnati aired from 1978 through 1982. Howard Hesseman played Dr. Johnny Fever, a DJ from Los Angeles who was fired from his previous job for saying the word "booger" on the air. In the show Hesseman would do some dialogue, introduce a song, and start the song. You'd hear a few notes, but never the whole song. (More...)
SF Hippies Can't Get Their Act Together
The annual 420 Hippie Hill event in Golden Gate Park, where large crowds of hippies, wannabe hippies, and hippie poseurs drape themselves in tie dye t-shirts and gather on a hill on 4/20 to smoke weed, was cancelled this year because the organizers couldn't get their act together. (More...)
Mozart to be inducted into the Rock 'n Roll Hall of Fame
Joining such hard-rocking inductees as Abba, Chet Atkins, Nat King Cole, and Neil Diamond, the Rock 'n Roll Hall of Fame is proud to induct Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart. (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
The One I Feel Sorry For Is Joses
We've had a lot of Jesus coverage lately here at the PDJ. But let's face it, we're not exactly cutting-edge in this subject area. Jesus has been making headlines for, oh, I guess it's a couple thousand years now. Jesus is a very strong brand. Jesus has a lot of mindshare. (More...)
Vacationing from Somnambulant Narrow Realities
So about six months ago, I was chilling in Chang Mai, Thailand with ICBINJ, perursing the Bangkok Times over my banana pancake and Big Chang breakfast when I spotted this article reprinted from the LA Times. It was about some kooks from California (where else?) who were claiming to have been to the front lines in Afgahnistan in mid-December and had recorded the whole feat on their website. "Holy Fuck!" I thought, "Now That's web journalism. Who are these guys!?" (More...)
My dear and close friend, Porn Maven Shannon Mariemont, sent me a titillating message the other day about her new project: the PornOrchestra. Her desire, at most, is to reinvent the porn soundtrack and, at least, to receive a cease-and-desist order like all her cool friends did last year. (More...)
It was the night of the Leonid meteor showers -- the perfect opportunity to break out the evil opaline liquor, get madder than hatters, and test wireless ethernet hardware... Would the plunging meteorites interfere with the 2.4GHz band? What about our delicate brain waves? (More...)
The Deep Dark Underbelly of the Star Wars Myth, or Ramayana Remembered
It's a fact: Star Wars is a blatant plagiarism of an ancient Asian legend, and the long lines of devout Star Wars freaks are really unscrupulous Asian copyright busters. From Indonesia to Thailand to Nepal, videos are available for sale or rent before they're even released in the US and UK due to this nerdy camcorder-clutching bunch. (More...)
High Availability Guinness Stress Test
All too often we forget the incredible depth of technology behind the weekly ritual of TNiPN@*. We tend to only become aware of the strategy of High Available Guinness (HAG) when it rises to the forefront during a complete and utter venue failure. Yet we should all be super grateful that this system exists. (More...)
