I spent about three hours tonight reading the journals of the Donner Party for no real good reason, except to think, "Hey, wouldn't it suck to be in the Donner Party?"
-- Tjames Madison
Today marks the birth date of the late great Bill Hicks.
Had he lived, he would have been 38. To mark this occasion
Hicks' partner-in-crime, Kevin Booth has paid tribute to
his fallen friend, with a broadcast of the set that made
David Letterman cower in fear.
Shortly before he shuffled off this mortal coil, Bill Hicks did his twelfth
appearance on David Letterman's show, with a set that left the audience in
tears of laughter, and a better understanding of how the world is. Later that
day, Hicks received a call from one of David's flunkies. He explained that when
the show moved to CBS, part of the requirement of the transfer was that Dave
and his entire staff would have to snip off their balls, and personally feed
them to a bunch of rednecks. And
while it was Letterman's show, it was Westinghouse's network. After the
Starchamber viewed Hick's material, three Mongolian enforcers were dispatched
to Dave's office to make sure that their prized neutered corporate lapdog was
still loyal.
In the end, Hicks' monologue was cut, and Dave made a few more bucks happily
swallowing down three servings of Mongolian Salty White Oyster Surprise. So
tune in and hear Bill's banned set, along with his appearance on Howard Stern's
radio show. You'll never be able to watch Letterman the same way again (if at
all).
Report filed from the desk of Arizona Bay Lifeguard Station 1
