Build Date: Fri May 23 05:00:59 2025 UTC
i should probably reiterate that this whole thing is probably a delusion. if it continues in my head i may write a spy novel.
-- Sylvia
All Good People Are Asleep And Dreaming
2000-02-08 13:04:12
Firecracker-related fatalities are on the rise in China. People want to blow things up to celebrate the Lunar New Year, and don't give a rat's ass about the fact that it's illegal. The result: Dangerous, illegal fireworks in every home! It's Fatalitastic! What a ride! What a trip!
Now, I don't mean to mock the dead, especially not dozens of dead Chinese people, who may become hopping clawed vampires if mocked after death.
There's all kinds of terrible bad death at the hands of fire. Towns are burning because people were dumb with fireworks and other people were dumb with fireworks legislation. The laws are getting more restrictive, and nobody is actually really giving much of a shit about restrictive laws.
People may be able to tolerate Five Year Plans and the Cultural Revolution, but there's NO WAY they'll be willing to put up with people ruining their Holiday Spirit.
And isn't that what New Year's Day is all about?
T O P S T O R I E S
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Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
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Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
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Musk claims Xitter security is staffed by idiots
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The Future Ain't What It Used To Be
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C L A S S I C P I G D O G
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Ratsnatcher gets HOT HOT HOT in this classic road tale that looks at the steamy underworld of Bay Area Linux advocacy. Loosen your collar for this one! (More...)
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Paranoid Strippers & Psychotic Crack Dealers (Tales of Christmas Eve)
Christmas day, for the last 17 or so years has bored me. I find that the real fun and excitement always takes place on Christmas Eve. Every other year, it's the excitement of the metaphorical hunt instead of the kill. Otherwise, it's just plain bad craziness. (More...)
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