Firecracker-related fatalities are on the rise in China. People want to blow things up to celebrate the Lunar New Year, and don't give a rat's ass about the fact that it's illegal. The result: Dangerous, illegal fireworks in every home! It's Fatalitastic! What a ride! What a trip!
Now, I don't mean to mock the dead, especially not dozens of dead Chinese
people, who may become hopping clawed vampires if mocked after death.
There's all kinds of terrible bad death at the hands of fire. Towns are
burning because people were dumb with fireworks and other people were dumb with
fireworks legislation. The laws are getting more restrictive, and nobody is
actually really giving much of a shit about restrictive laws.
People may be able to tolerate Five Year Plans and the Cultural Revolution, but
there's NO WAY they'll be willing to put up with people ruining their Holiday
Spirit.
