Build Date: Fri Feb 14 10:50:11 2025 UTC
Ahh, what's the point in trying to explain it to you? It's simpler to just say FUCK YOU.
-- H.R. Pufenstuf
Look Out! Giant Cockroaches!
2001-11-22 00:05:28
Just what you wanted to know: roaches have been on this planet since way before the dinosaurs.
Think about this next time you try to get rid of the critters in your apartment. Roaches have survived the impact of a comet that wiped out the dinosaurs, as well as several ice ages.
This is Darwinian principle at its finest. We humans teeter on the brink of self-extiction just because we're so smart and big and all that stuff that we pride ourselves on. But where is the real elegance in the design of lifeforms? Not in the opposable thumb, but in exponential breeding.
Gotta admire the cockroach. Maybe we can learn to be more like them.
T O P S T O R I E S
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Why I'm pretty sure JD Vance had sex with a couch
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C L A S S I C P I G D O G
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Alright kids, this is the column where you write in with the lurid details of your personal lives, and I put them on the Internet for everyone to snicker at. But also, I give you a free Tarot reading, so there's that. (More...)
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This week: another fine spocktail from the beverage researchers at SMRL! Drink it in peace, because WE DID THE RESEARCH! (More...)
It’s election night. My wife and I are holed-up in this hotel that my political party has rented out for the evening. Outside, people are being violently beaten for whom they voted for. Is this South Africa? Perhaps we’re in Haiti or some Southern state during the 60’s. Of all the places where this sort of thing happens, it’s mind-boggling that we are in Portland, Maine. (More...)