The chance that anyone has a bomb on a plane is very, very small. The chance that TWO people are carrying bombs is infinitessimally small. That's why I always carry a bomb with me when I fly. It improves my odds of surviving the flight without getting blown to bits.
WE'RE STILL TOTAL LOSERS JESUS (cont'd) 2000-02-20 01:35:00
By Mr. Bad
Mr. Bad Ah-HA! I knew it I knew it I knew it I knew it
Tjames I find Leisuretown a tad discomfiting.
Arkuat dudes, i always hang out here
Mr. Bad NO overlap in personnel? Tristram Shandy is not one of the
Jerk City folk.
Mr. Bad Tristan Farnon, I mean.
Mr. Bad Or whatever.
CAREFULLY INVESTIGATORS WOULD'VE NOTICED THE SERVERS WERE
HOSTED BY THE SAME ISP
Rands
Arkuat why didn't you send me an email to let me know you had an
interview scheduled for EFnet #pigdog?
Mr. Bad JESUS!
Tjames It's OK, arkie. We'll remove your contributions post
facto.
Mr. Bad What kind of journalist am I!?
Arkuat okay cool
Mr. Bad Cripes.
Mr. Bad Yeah, we'll scribble you out in post, arkie.
Mr. Bad Like a Politburo member fallen out of favor.
Arkuat okay if i watch? i could just go trolling on #philosophy if
you want me to go away
Tjames Like HST's cigarette in that Gap ad.
Fine with me.
Rands
Mr. Bad Arkie, no, don't bother.
Mr. Bad Arkie, meet Rands, from Jerkcity.com.
HOLA
Rands
Mr. Bad Arkuat is a Pigdog fellow from back in the day.
Tjames Arkuat is a Monster Truck Extropian.
Arkuat greetings.
Mr. Bad Well, so, I want to get into an interesting topic, which is
the GAYNESS.
UH OH
Rands
Tjames It's OK. We're not GAY.
Mr. Bad Do you get lots of irate letters from gay beatniks or gay
scottie dogs or gay aliens who are angry about the way they are portrayed on Jerk City?
Mr. Bad Well, except Arkuat. He's queer as a chocolate pizza.
Actually no. I can't think of one nasty hate mail we've
received
Rands
Tjames Yeah, his GAYNESS contains multitudes.
Enigma enters the IRC channel.
Tjames haha
Mr. Bad Gah! Jesus! THis is getting to be a major gangfuck!
I mean, it's pretty obvious WE'RE TRYING TO BE FUCKING
FUNNY HERE PEOPLE
Rands
Mr. Bad [Enigma], meet rands from Jerk City.
Enigma Hey rands
Tjames We should have set up a special pig-interview channel or
sumthin
GANG BANG RANDS QUICK
Rands
Mr. Bad rands, meet [Enigma], my next Perl regexp.
Enigma Interface is as interface does
Mr. Bad Well, I think that's fairly obvious to most people, rands,
but the internet is full of Literalist Fuckheads.
Tjames Well, I have to admit, I think it's funny to call things
gay, too.
Tjames But I called something gay once, and Mr. bad said, "Tjames,
you should not make fun of people just because they are gay," He's so sensitive.
So, do you guys have a favorite character?
Rands
Tjames I like the alien with the tongue, just because it's so
creepy.
Mr. Bad Yeah, my favorite is rands, the scotty dog.
Mr. Bad I mean, the beatnik.
Spigot
Rands
Mr. Bad Hey, WE'LL ask the questions, rands!
Mr. Bad Jesus!
READY FOR MY CLOSE-UP HERE
Rands
Mr. Bad So, where does the Jerk City name come from? Like, City of
Jerking off?
Domain name popped in my head in '98...
Rands
Mr. Bad Or city of people who are mean?
JERK = funny. CITY = lots of funny.
Rands
Tjames Like extra jerk.
Mr. Bad Oh, hey, I should have figgered that out before.
Registered the name and then THOUGHT HARD ABOUT WHAT TO DO
WITH IT
Rands
It was originally going to be a masterbation resource
Rands
BUT I CAN'T STAND LOOKING AT BONERS
Rands
Arkuat I like how you use ALL CAPS
ALL CAPS = FUNNY
Rands
Mr. Bad I was touched very deeply. I didn't feel so alone any
more.
-MORE-
wary@pigdog.org
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