WE'RE STILL TOTAL LOSERS JESUS (cont'd)
2000-02-20 01:35:00
Mr. Bad |
Ah-HA! I knew it I knew it I knew it I knew it |
Tjames |
I find Leisuretown a tad discomfiting. |
Arkuat |
dudes, i always hang out here |
Mr. Bad |
NO overlap in personnel? Tristram Shandy is not one of the Jerk City folk. |
Mr. Bad |
Tristan Farnon, I mean. |
Mr. Bad |
Or whatever. |
| CAREFULLY INVESTIGATORS WOULD'VE NOTICED THE SERVERS WERE HOSTED BY THE SAME ISP | Rands |
Arkuat |
why didn't you send me an email to let me know you had an interview scheduled for EFnet #pigdog? |
Mr. Bad |
JESUS! |
Tjames |
It's OK, arkie. We'll remove your contributions post facto. |
Mr. Bad |
What kind of journalist am I!? |
Arkuat |
okay cool |
Mr. Bad |
Cripes. |
Mr. Bad |
Yeah, we'll scribble you out in post, arkie. |
Mr. Bad |
Like a Politburo member fallen out of favor. |
Arkuat |
okay if i watch? i could just go trolling on #philosophy if you want me to go away |
Tjames |
Like HST's cigarette in that Gap ad. |
| Fine with me. | Rands |
Mr. Bad |
Arkie, no, don't bother. |
Mr. Bad |
Arkie, meet Rands, from Jerkcity.com. |
| HOLA | Rands |
Mr. Bad |
Arkuat is a Pigdog fellow from back in the day. |
Tjames |
Arkuat is a Monster Truck Extropian. |
Arkuat |
greetings. |
Mr. Bad |
Well, so, I want to get into an interesting topic, which is the GAYNESS. |
| UH OH | Rands |
Tjames |
It's OK. We're not GAY. |
Mr. Bad |
Do you get lots of irate letters from gay beatniks or gay scottie dogs or gay aliens who are angry about the way they are portrayed on Jerk City? |
Mr. Bad |
Well, except Arkuat. He's queer as a chocolate pizza. |
| Actually no. I can't think of one nasty hate mail we've received | Rands |
Tjames |
Yeah, his GAYNESS contains multitudes. |
Enigma enters the IRC channel.
Tjames |
haha |
Mr. Bad |
Gah! Jesus! THis is getting to be a major gangfuck! |
| I mean, it's pretty obvious WE'RE TRYING TO BE FUCKING FUNNY HERE PEOPLE | Rands |
Mr. Bad |
[Enigma], meet rands from Jerk City. |
Enigma |
Hey rands |
Tjames |
We should have set up a special pig-interview channel or sumthin |
| GANG BANG RANDS QUICK | Rands |
Mr. Bad |
rands, meet [Enigma], my next Perl regexp. |
Enigma |
Interface is as interface does |
Mr. Bad |
Well, I think that's fairly obvious to most people, rands, but the internet is full of Literalist Fuckheads. |
Tjames |
Well, I have to admit, I think it's funny to call things gay, too. |
Tjames |
But I called something gay once, and Mr. bad said, "Tjames, you should not make fun of people just because they are gay," He's so sensitive. |
| So, do you guys have a favorite character? | Rands |
Tjames |
I like the alien with the tongue, just because it's so creepy. |
Mr. Bad |
Yeah, my favorite is rands, the scotty dog. |
Mr. Bad |
I mean, the beatnik. |
| Spigot | Rands |
Mr. Bad |
Hey, WE'LL ask the questions, rands! |
Mr. Bad |
Jesus! |
| READY FOR MY CLOSE-UP HERE | Rands |
Mr. Bad |
So, where does the Jerk City name come from? Like, City of Jerking off? |
| Domain name popped in my head in '98... | Rands |
Mr. Bad |
Or city of people who are mean? |
| JERK = funny. CITY = lots of funny. | Rands |
Tjames |
Like extra jerk. |
Mr. Bad |
Oh, hey, I should have figgered that out before. |
| Registered the name and then THOUGHT HARD ABOUT WHAT TO DO WITH IT | Rands |
| It was originally going to be a masterbation resource | Rands |
Mr. Bad |
I want to point out that my favorite jerkcity is the one where SPigot says, like, "Not a day goes by that I don't jerk off so much I get a stomach ache." |
| BUT I CAN'T STAND LOOKING AT BONERS | Rands |
Arkuat |
I like how you use ALL CAPS |
| ALL CAPS = FUNNY | Rands |
Mr. Bad |
I was touched very deeply. I didn't feel so alone any more. |
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