Build Date: Tue Oct 14 15:30:32 2025 UTC
[Pigdog] is bigger than you. There is no "I" in "TEAM", just as there is no "YOU" in Pigdog.
-- Master Squid
Monkey Business
Apes, apes and more apes... from the little ones to the great ones.
Pigdog Journal Articles
2006-02-17
... tell everyone about the upcoming pillow fight. It also helps to show up with a pillow and not to hit people without pillows. Much simpler rules than the movie version with the similar name, and a lot more fun.
2004-08-09
Koko the signing gorilla made history this week, when she underwent dental surgery for a self-diagnosed toothache.
2002-04-05
In what has become apparently an annual ritual, a pack of ultra fundamentalist Monkeys, incapable of accepting Mankind's rise as the dominate species on the planet, has attacked a girls school in India, in an apparent attempt to thwart the education process with the ultimate goal of toppling our civilization.
2002-02-16
In a move that has baffled most major Wall Street and Defense analysts, Tjames has apparently invaded Europe, establishing a presence and even planting a flag. The analysts have all been stunned into silence and collectively provided no comments, while off the record "claiming" to have never heard of America's favorite usenet personality.
1999-07-09
I've often felt that any idiot can make money on net stocks these days. As it turns out, most lower primates can do so as well.
1999-06-29
Gotta love PBS and its Nature program about mandrills. Fascinating to decode, too! "Delve into the mystery behind this animal's unique coloring..." (= Blue butt.) "Not much is known about how mandrills behave in the wild..." (= Toss feces.)
1999-06-15
A new study conducted by researchers at Johns Hopkins University spells out some bad news for monkeys who are into techno music and all-night raves.
1999-06-08
Those Goddamned Mandrills are at it again! And this time they've got a WEB SITE!
1999-05-12
These dumbasses have not only been waiting in line to see Star Wars - Episode One - The Phantom Menace (Sheesh, could George have made that any longer?) for over a month and they still got nearly a week to go. All to watch a two hour movie that will play all fucking summer long. And they got gonads to put their silliness all online for the world to see.
1999-03-05
Perhaps there is nothing more ego-deflating in the world for an actor than having to do a movie with a monkey. I find it particularly pleasurable that even at the height of the mania about the 20-something TV show "Friends," the best that co-star Matt LeBlanc could get out of Hollywood was "Ed," a movie about a monkey that plays baseball. Haw haw haw!
1999-03-01
In other non-news today, Intel has made a desperate lunge at the young and hip in order to sell more of their SHITTY NEW CHIPS. Their ploy? A new animated television commercial featuring a red-assed mandrill made out of socks. HA! Like _that's_ gonna work.
1998-12-20
There's an old saying that says, "If you can't get them to laugh with a monkey, then, man, you should get out of the business." With that in mind, we offer you the latest in Web scams: the FREE MONKEY Web site.
1998-11-25
A 77 year old client for the Darwin Awards sleep-walked his way into a swamp filled with alligators waking up face to face with a 3 footer and surrounded by a dozen more of the big lizards. He was able to fight them off with his cane (which he apparently needs for sleep-walking) until help arrived and avoided becoming gator bait.
1998-11-24
That's right, infidelity is common in the wild with supposedly monogamous mammals fucking every chance they get. Damn, these animals act just like us humans and you can just about see them hanging out at the local "meat" market just waiting to bang some bitch and then heading home to the wife and 2.5 kids. With all of this "Monkey Business" going on, can it be long before the Moral Majority seeks to legislate the behavior of all "great" apes?
Offsite links shared by staff writers
2011-03-12
2011-03-11
2003-03-13
Is that 8 BILLION DOLLARS WORTH OF BONDS in your pocket or are you just happy to see the Swiss border guards? Don Johnson's pricey ride.
2001-02-10
2001-01-02
"Revolting, yet somehow mesmerizing!" This page has the best animated psychedelic mandrill butt on the Web -- BAR NONE.
2000-12-08
2000-11-06
1999-07-12
1999-07-12
T O P S T O R I E S
California Glory Hole attracts huge crowds
A glory hole at Napa's Lake Berryessa is drawing huge crowds. According to Chris Lee, the general manager for the Solano County Water Agency, the glory hole hasn't been active since 2019, and only restarted operations on Feb 4. (More...)
Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
Republican State Senator Justin Eichorn of Minnesota was arrested for soliciting a teen girl on Monday just hours after he introduced a bill proposing "Trump derangement syndrome" (TDS) as a form of mental illness. (More...)
Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
The parents of a Texas girl who died from the measles are defending their decision not to vaccinate their daughter. "She says they would still say 'Don't do the shots,'" an unidentified translator for the parents said. "They think it’s not as bad as the media is making it out to be." (More...)
Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
"I'm mayor now" said write-in mayoral candidate and founder of Pirate’s Booty Snacks Robert Ehrlich after losing the election for Mayor of Sea Cliff, NY. Then he tried to take over the Village Hall and fire everyone. (More...)
Musk claims Xitter security is staffed by idiots
Earlier this month Xitter experienced a massive outage. In an interview, Musk told Fox Business that he believes the attack came from "IP addresses originating in the Ukraine area." (More...)
The Future Ain't What It Used To Be
Ideas have taken horrifying shape and rooted into our modern reality. (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
The Deep Dark Underbelly of the Star Wars Myth, or Ramayana Remembered
It's a fact: Star Wars is a blatant plagiarism of an ancient Asian legend, and the long lines of devout Star Wars freaks are really unscrupulous Asian copyright busters. From Indonesia to Thailand to Nepal, videos are available for sale or rent before they're even released in the US and UK due to this nerdy camcorder-clutching bunch. (More...)
Experimenter is a film released in 2015 starring Peter Sarsgaard. It tells the story of Dr. Stanley Milgram's life, including the infamous Milgram electric shock experiment, tests on crowds, and his work developing a theory on the mechanics of social networks. It currently streams on Netflix. (More...)
Place the Lighter on the Ground and Let Us See Your Hands
So I have been thinking on this whole flag burning issue and all the things it could imply. Now a lot of people right now are saying that there are more important issues at stake and something so trivial is a waste of time. Believing such is really losing sight of some very key changes happening in our nation right now. Being a strict conservative, and currently serving in Iraq, I was surprised to find that I am actually appalled that the House approved a ban on flag burning. (More...)
During a magnificent sunny day in a fast receding autumn, the Spock Science Monitor reporters once again blew the playa dust off of their computers and covered the 2002 Burning Man Decompression – held every year just east of Portola Hill in beautiful San Francisco. Both an afternoon and evening issues were released to the unsuspecting crowd of freaks attempting to in some small way experience the euphoria of the playa – if but for a brief afternoon far from the desolation of Northern Nevada. (More...)
Absinthia: The Pigdog Interview
Absinthe is making a come back for the Millennium. Even English people are slurping it down in pubs, eschewing their normal, healthy stouts and ales. And why not? Hell, if the planet is going to explode anyway, why not ride the DEATH WAVE in, and celebrate Y2K with the most entertaining and vicious elixir you can find? Come! Explore the "Absinthe Underground" with El Snatcher, Mr. Bad, and Splicer, as they interview the notorious absinthe bootlegger, Absinthia. (More...)
Report from Spiritual Machines
Arkuat gives you the inside scoop on the "Spiritual Machines" panel and conclave. Wacky excitement ensues! (More...)
