Pigdog Journal Articles
Goddamn Toothpaste Marketing Department Fuckwads
I like the flavor of peppermint, tolerate spearmint, and absolutely hate wintergreen. So why can’t toothpaste companies label their products so I know which of those three very different mint flavors they’re putting in the tube?
Expensify files for their IPO
Expensify filed for their IPO the other day. As required by law they released a statement describing their S-1 filing with the SEC. The announcement was rather dry and formal and legal, as such announcements are, so to give it some zing they had a three-eyed spokesperson read it while eating fish food and gold coins on a 97 second Twitter video.
General Electric: Corporation with Benefits
GE reported global profits of $14.2 billion with $5.1 billion of the total from U.S. operations. Its American tax bill? LESS THAN ZERO. Based on tax laws which G.E. lobbyists helped to write, G.E. managed to claim a tax benefit of $3.2 billion.
Big Oil Completely Innocent
Buried somewhere in the relatively insignificant
annals of this afternoon's secondary or tertiary news
stories is a little piece about how the Federal Trade
Commission has released its report that Big Oil hasn't
been gouging Americans in the wake of Hurricane
Katrina, or any time in the last 20 years, for that
matter. There's been no market manipulation, no
Enron-like scams, no nada. Big Oil has played by all
the rules, succumbed to market forces, and otherwise
been an upstanding capitalist citizen. Thank gawd the
FTC was there to vindicate their buddies! The mind
boggles as to what an actual investigation by a
non-conflicted FTC might have found.
Help Reclaim the Public Domain
Would you like to have a positive impact on copyright law, take a stand against corporate greed, and help put works back in the public domain that belong there? Lawrence Lessig needs your story.
First CBS executives won't air an ad
made by MoveOn.org which asks the very simple question of who is going to pay for the current half trillion dollar deficit we are running. The obvious answer is the children. Duh. But CBS won't run it.
The Ugly Orphan
As I write this, an oil tanker containing 20 million gallons, less the
roughly 2 million gallons that have already leaked out, has broken in half
and sunk off the coast of Spain. There are numerous reports as to the
ownership of the vessel as well as its "inspection" record in various
sketchy ports of call. The ship's owners are quick to defend themselves
against potential liability, Spain is jousting with Portugal over who's
going to pay for the cleanup, and there are already the usual wildlife
casualties of any such toxic disaster. But one thing is conspicuously
missing from this whole scenario: The oil's real owner.
On Your Knees, Martha
If Martha Stewart ends up going to trial for insider trading, I'll have to
have a crash transsexual operation and seek immediate employment with Bear
Stearns. Since I'll be a seriously hot woman, the dicks at the firm will
want me to start immediately. Who knows, maybe I'll even get down on my
knees and suck a couple of sexual harassment settlements out of them before
I finish my master plan. That is to commit gross insider trading or massive
fraud so that I can be sent to Club Fed and have Martha as my prison bitch.
A Slippery Exit
So let me get this straight. U.S. oil companies, such as ChevronTexaco and ExxonMobile, have been buying Iraqi oil since 1996 under the oil-for-food program implemented by the UN so that average Iraqis would have food, medical supplies, and a semblance of infrastructure. Now, all of a sudden, those same oil companies are dropping Saddam's crude exports like a Catholic priest drops his boyfriend in the light of day. And according to our "diplomatic sources," the whole reason is because, all this time, Saddam has been skimming money off the top in the form of a surcharge per barrel.
Boil Them in Oil
Yesterday, Dynergy, a large energy company that is in many ways very similar to Enron, announced that it had inflated its revenue streams some 4.5 BILLION dollars through various trading shenanigans - mostly reverse trades.
Down at the Money Mart
It's not like I have a heroin problem, see. I'm just a self-indulgent brat who likes to live beyond her means. When I zip down to my corner Money Mart for a little cash-till-payday loan, I'm really not planning to spend it on drugs. I'll spend it on sushi. Seventy bucks of interest for a two-week $400 loan is perfectly reasonable, if you really need that hamachi.
Making the Planes Run On Time
Staggering up from a holiday-binge induced coma, this correspondent
Rip Van Winkle hallucination because it's looking a lot like Italy...
Adobe Nabbed for Piracy!
After playing the heavy on piracy issues all over the place, Adobe has been barred from distributing or selling InDesign 1.5 because it contains.... unlicensed software!
Copy-Protected CDs Coming
Universal announced on Monday that they will be releasing copy-protected CDs in
this week - so no longer will citizens be able to excercise their 1st amendment
fair use to listen to "their" music how they choose. Corporate Bastards!!!
Offsite links shared by staff writers
Listen to the voicemail of Enron, "the world's greatest company". Flash/Audio only