Build Date: Mon Aug 4 20:00:18 2025 UTC
Who knew I could write something longer than a smug one liner.
-- Donkey Hotey
Natalie Portman built out of Legos
2000-09-09 11:38:08
Lego fetish? A twisted man spends seven months building animals out of Legos. But not just animals -- 14-foot long animals. And, of course -- Natalie Portman.
What kind of man takes a photograph of Audrey Hepburn, then painstakingly reconstructs it using plastic bricks? Demented Los Angeles has warped his mind, brewing an unhealthy fascination with toys, icons, and repetitive assembling motions. You know schizophernia has taken hold when you start to think: why go to a symphony when I can just make a bust of classical composer Ludwig van Beethoven using Legos?
The most disturbing manifestations are the erogenous hind-shots of a dinosaur. The toy pervert stands beside the life-sized replica, lovingly fondling its reptilean head....
And of course there's the life-sized sculpture of Natalie Portman.
T O P S T O R I E S
California Glory Hole attracts huge crowds
A glory hole at Napa's Lake Berryessa is drawing huge crowds. According to Chris Lee, the general manager for the Solano County Water Agency, the glory hole hasn't been active since 2019, and only restarted operations on Feb 4. (More...)
Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
Republican State Senator Justin Eichorn of Minnesota was arrested for soliciting a teen girl on Monday just hours after he introduced a bill proposing "Trump derangement syndrome" (TDS) as a form of mental illness. (More...)
Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
The parents of a Texas girl who died from the measles are defending their decision not to vaccinate their daughter. "She says they would still say 'Don't do the shots,'" an unidentified translator for the parents said. "They think it’s not as bad as the media is making it out to be." (More...)
Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
"I'm mayor now" said write-in mayoral candidate and founder of Pirate’s Booty Snacks Robert Ehrlich after losing the election for Mayor of Sea Cliff, NY. Then he tried to take over the Village Hall and fire everyone. (More...)
Musk claims Xitter security is staffed by idiots
Earlier this month Xitter experienced a massive outage. In an interview, Musk told Fox Business that he believes the attack came from "IP addresses originating in the Ukraine area." (More...)
The Future Ain't What It Used To Be
Ideas have taken horrifying shape and rooted into our modern reality. (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
Spock Went, Spock Wrote, Spock Kicked Ass
Every Labor Day weekend a large portion of the PDJ staff joins 30,000 other freaks at one of the biggest and strangest art festivals in the world - Burning Man - somewhere on the edge of the Black Rock Desert. Our base of operations is always the ultra swank Spock Mountain Research Labs - the World Leaders in Beverage Science and Leisure Technology. This year, we hauled up our computers, printers and a massive digital duplicator, determined to become Black Rock City's third daily newspaper. Even Spock was surprised by our success - news will never be viewed the same on the playa. Read all seven issues of the 2002 Spock Science Monitor for yourself and see why. (More...)
It's winter in Idaho, and Boise personality "Lego-Man" reports on how he celebrated Thanksgiving. "I fed my wife, mother and sister wine slurpies!" (More...)
For all you Sensitive New Age Guys (SNAG) out there who complain about not getting laid, I'm gonna let you in on a little secret: Women only like to have sex with jerks. (More...)
This week: another fine spocktail from the beverage researchers at SMRL! Drink it in peace, because WE DID THE RESEARCH! (More...)
Brother Wayne Lays Down the Truth
Flesh interviews Wayne Kramer of MC5. (More...)
Pigdog brings you SETI astronomer Seth Shostak to bring you the truth about Ay-leens (More...)
