Build Date: Tue Jun 2 02:00:10 2026 UTC
Never trust a man in a blue trenchcoat; never drive a car when you're dead.
-- Tom Waits
Dumb Brits in Love with Hamster Music
1999-12-10 01:35:32
This is why we fought the king. The weirdo Brits are about to make a song featuring samples of the music from that stupid HamsterDance site their biggest-selling record of the holiday season.
The song, performed by a group called the Cuban Boys, was played by the venerable and possibly senile John Peel the other day on his BBC Radio 1 show and generated "the biggest reaction since I first played God Save the Queen by the Sex Pistols." The hamster record will be released Monday and everyone in Britain will buy a copy and then there will be big debates in Parliament about these hamsters.
OK. But here's why the Brits are really dumb: the number one record, currently, the one that everyone is worried that the hamsters will knock off its spot on the charts, is by Cliff Richard.
Only in England could there be a big controversy involving hamsters and Cliff Richard. London bookmakers are even taking bets on the matter. The Cuban Boys are 10-1 longshots to take over the number one selling spot, with some other stupid Limey band called Westlife 4-7 favorites to get there first.
Also there is a stupid dance craze in England now based on the stupid dancing hamsters. Freaks.
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