Build Date: Wed Sep 3 01:30:11 2025 UTC
I don't let cops and judges tell me what I ought to think democracy is.
-- Dashiell Hammett
The Glass Bead Game
1999-10-01 12:52:53
Crazy! Straight outta the pages of Herman Hesse's Magister Ludi come a whole shitload of Glass Bead Games! What's up with THAT?
I dunno how many folks have read this book (it also goes under the title The Glass Bead Game), but it's pretty OK in that high-flown sappy romantic early-20th-century German way. The crazy premise is that it's the FUTURE and there are these GUYS, see, and they live in a MONASTERY. CRAZY BEGINNING, eh? But it gets BETTER, trust me.
So anyways these guys live in this crazy monastery where they spend all their time learning this bizarre chess-like game, The Glass Bead Game. The deal with this game is that it is intricate and insanely complex, like chess, but instead of having a war metaphor, it's got a metaphor metaphor. Like, each player gets a chance to arrange these glass beads that represent IDEAS in weird crazy patterns. One bead per turn, and so forth. It's all complex and very symbolic and shit.
See, but the deal with this was is that this game is a METAPHOR ITSELF, for all kinds of formal systems and the process of learning to manipulate symbols -- KINDA LIKE WRITING or COMPUTER PROGRAMMING. Unfortunately, this interesting but kind of heavy-handed allegory has been totally weirdly taken too LITERALLY by a whole bunch of people.
Hesse never laid out the rules for the game explicitly, because, like, HOW are you supposed to represent ALL IDEAS in a finite number of beads and spatial relations and whatnot? You can't. Nobody could possibly do it. But, apparently, some people have tried.
There are a whole bunch of glass bead games on the Web. I got a link into the very cool Open Directory page about glass bead games right here. Go check it out, wonder at the amount of literalist fuckhead pills in circulation on our planet, and then go make some patterns of your own.
T O P S T O R I E S
California Glory Hole attracts huge crowds
A glory hole at Napa's Lake Berryessa is drawing huge crowds. According to Chris Lee, the general manager for the Solano County Water Agency, the glory hole hasn't been active since 2019, and only restarted operations on Feb 4. (More...)
Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
Republican State Senator Justin Eichorn of Minnesota was arrested for soliciting a teen girl on Monday just hours after he introduced a bill proposing "Trump derangement syndrome" (TDS) as a form of mental illness. (More...)
Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
The parents of a Texas girl who died from the measles are defending their decision not to vaccinate their daughter. "She says they would still say 'Don't do the shots,'" an unidentified translator for the parents said. "They think it’s not as bad as the media is making it out to be." (More...)
Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
"I'm mayor now" said write-in mayoral candidate and founder of Pirate’s Booty Snacks Robert Ehrlich after losing the election for Mayor of Sea Cliff, NY. Then he tried to take over the Village Hall and fire everyone. (More...)
Musk claims Xitter security is staffed by idiots
Earlier this month Xitter experienced a massive outage. In an interview, Musk told Fox Business that he believes the attack came from "IP addresses originating in the Ukraine area." (More...)
The Future Ain't What It Used To Be
Ideas have taken horrifying shape and rooted into our modern reality. (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
Skunk School -- Learn Why Not To Keep Skunks As Pets
There is an alarming trend in pet purchasing habits this fall. People inspired by the WWII film, "Life is Beautiful" -- the one with that annoying Italian guy -- are buying descented skunks by the millions. (More...)
Datelined "Historic Mariposa," the fateful press release came in like an angry wind, announcing the release of a self-produced album, "Ordinary Hero," by occasional Pigdog contributor Thom Stark, in the language and tone of a Major Event, setting off a brief firestorm around the pigdog mailing list. (More...)
Grow better illegal mushrooms than lousy "Psilocybe fanaticus"
Disclaimer: PaoTzu's a1 illegal mushroom cultivation cookbook is meant for educational purposes only. Be aware of the techniques used by hardcore criminals! Protect your children! Read, learn, educate. Do not try this at home. (More...)
Clowns Take on God in Mysterious Annual Ceremony
Last Sunday's (the 6th) Grimaldi Service at a small church in East London was a red-letter day for clowns worldwide. About a hundred old-school red-nosed clowns made the sombre trip to darkest Dalston to pay their respects to clowns who died in the last year and to thank God for the gift of laughter in a bizarre ceremony presided over by the eccentric Reverend Clown Roly, resplendent in a garish red lumberjack shirt with oversized gold lapels. (More...)
Report from Spiritual Machines
Arkuat gives you the inside scoop on the "Spiritual Machines" panel and conclave. Wacky excitement ensues! (More...)
The IBM Selectric Typewriter Changed My Life
I ran my hands lovingly across her frame, lightly brushing her metallic nipples with my fingers, admiring the shapes and the ways of her curves, the empathetic hum she produced as I had my way with her, the way she made it all seem so effortless and right... she didn't even seem to mind the way I roughly manipulated her knobs and tweaked her casing. She was extremely tolerant, for a typewriter. (More...)