Build Date: Tue Oct 22 17:50:09 2024 UTC
The ultimate sin of any performer is contempt for the audience.
-- Lester Bangs
Hunter on the New Porsche Carrera 4
1999-11-16 15:01:17
Tired of wimpy Japanese sports cars? Then stop buying them for crissakes!!! Buy your next sports car from the evil Germans! Porsche is the only car company confident enough to have Hunter test drive its best car. And what a car it is... full bore, flashy, and able to leap tall Colorodo mountains without even breathing hard.
Who isn't sick of these fake sports cars? The Miata is not a sports car, it's a go-cart!! Honda Prelude? Prelude to what?? A real sports car? Har nar HARRR!! And the biggest telltale sign: these companies are too scared to let Hunter test drive their cars.
Do you think Toyota has enough confidence to have Hunter test drive any of it sports cars? The answer is a flat no.
Porsche 911 Carrera 4, my friend.
T O P S T O R I E S
Another Nobel Prize-Winning Author Describes Drunkenness
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In 2010 Dr. Cheng-Huai Ruan discovered a way to cause a patient with an abnormal heartbeat to get back into a normal rhythm by sticking a finger up the patient's ass. (More...)
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SF Hippies Can't Get Their Act Together
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Mozart to be inducted into the Rock 'n Roll Hall of Fame
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C L A S S I C P I G D O G
The Deep Dark Underbelly of the Star Wars Myth, or Ramayana Remembered
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During a magnificent sunny day in a fast receding autumn, the Spock Science Monitor reporters once again blew the playa dust off of their computers and covered the 2002 Burning Man Decompression – held every year just east of Portola Hill in beautiful San Francisco. Both an afternoon and evening issues were released to the unsuspecting crowd of freaks attempting to in some small way experience the euphoria of the playa – if but for a brief afternoon far from the desolation of Northern Nevada. (More...)
Patient Joab's scientifick editorial discusses aspect of the space-time-beer continuum never before processed by sub-bush-robot minds!!! Too fabulantastic to contempulate! (More...)
Johnnie Royale's Guide to Wakes
Wakes can present problems for Bad People of the Future. (If you don't know what a BPotF is, you need to read more of the PDJ.) Sure, your friend is gone and you miss him and that really sucks; it does, I know. But all Bad People of the Future are gonna die, and they have all accepted that fact. They do deserve, however, to have one final kickass party to celebrate all the bad things they've done in the past, present and future. And you, as a friend, have to make sure that their desire for a final send off is well executed (sorry for the pun). That's just the way of BPotFdom. (More...)
A Blast from the Past! Pao Tzu goes over and under the crucial variables in the production and consumption of Salvia Divinorum. A must read for psychonauts of all stripes. (More...)
40 Acres, a Mule, and a Crummy 90-Second Spot on Weekend Update
Consider the plight of the Black Man. The Black Man on "Saturday Night Live," I mean. Has there ever been a more pathetic thing than a token unredeemed for 28 years? Where is the NAACP when you really need them? (More...)
