Build Date: Tue Mar 5 13:00:07 2024 UTC

Personally I think it is a shitty suggestion... and since this is America... I don't have to justify my reasons.
-- Johnnie Royale

Strange Brew

by Downer Cow

2003-05-21 21:27:28

Canadians test sick cow's head after aging it for three (3) months. Surprise! It's your favorite, and certainly mine, BSE. I guess good things come to those who wait. Things had been slow on my beat anyway.

My contacts north of the ice curtain gave me this info about the dates, and sure enough when I look at the Globe & Mail report, that durn cow's head was kept in a lab freezer from Feb 8 until May.

No big deal, right? The cow was quarantined & deemed "unfit for consumption" so McDonald's Canada doesn't need to look south for its meat supply, right? Right!

Of course not! No need for panic, unless there's any chicken or pork involved. (McMystery Nugget anyone?) See, Doc Luterbach, "chief veterinarian for animal health for the food inspection agency's western area," says the carcass went to a rendering plant where it got mulched into food for chicken & swine. Hmm . . . I myself had beef, chicken AND swine last night in a super tasty combo chow mein. Finished the leftovers this evening before my agent got through to me.

I thought I was the last Downer Cow to make it to the US of Eh, but I've got this funny feeling in my stomach that says it just ain't so. Beauty.

Over.  End of Story.  Go home now.

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