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Boycott Molson!

by Tjames Madison

2000-05-10 00:31:21

It says it right there in black and white, or whatever color that's supposed to be. Right there on the web, anyway. Those filthy Canadians are at it again. "I am Canadian," a little javascript doohcikey announces, "because The UN rates us #1, sorry US."

And because "I am true, north strong and free." And "because" hundreds of other nasty propoganda bomblets that a submit button processes into this nefarious, immoral website. Click on the "submit your rant" button and give your own reason why "I am Canadian." I did. I am Canadian "because I am gay," I told it.

But this isn't your run-of-the-mill Evil Canadia Firster site. Nope. This one hurts because this site is actually set up and run by Molson, the giant Canuck brewery. Try going to molson.com. You CAN'T. You get deflected to this place, where you have to read horrible pro-Canadia stuff and look at pictures of hockey sticks and the like. There are maple leafs EVERYWHERE! It's TERRIBLE!

There's also a page of "pro-Canadian" sites on the Web, like that helps. We've already identified most of these places, and targeted them for action, bub. You betcha.

So I just want to ask all of you good Americans who are as concerned tonight as I am, please don't drink Molson beer until they take down this site. I never drink Molson anyway, so it won't be tough to boycott it. But if you DO drink Molson, and if you ARE afraid of those damned filthy Canadians, as every decent person should be, pay a visit to the link below and ask yourself just how good that beer really tastes.

Over.  End of Story.  Go home now.

yaddayadda@pigdog.org

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