Build Date: Tue Jun 9 14:30:07 2026 UTC
We’re living in a parallel universe. Unfortunately it’s the one where Spock grows a beard.
-- Baron Earl
Ay-leens Infiltrate Livermore Labs!!!
1999-06-12 11:31:25
Un-fucking-believable. Not only has the U.S. Gov't allowed those sneaky Chinese to make off with all of our national secrets - but now they are installing an Ay-leen starship in the heart of one of our most high tech and sooper-secret weapons labs.
Look at this thing... see the evil spaceship; see the puny humans in front of it. This thing is a monster and it is full of evil. Laser targeting chamber my ass. That is an Ay-leen spaceship and it is being hookup up to a huge massive jillion watt energy source right here in the Bay Area... Right under our noses. The gall they have.
And what really chaps my hide is that the U.S. Gov't is spending at least 1.2 Billion (that's right BILLION... $1,200,000,000.00 dollars) to help these Ay-leens with their wretched plans. We don't know what their plans are, but we're pretty sure that they aren't gonna be good for Joe and Jane Doe of the good Old U.S. of A. Rest assured dear readers that every resource the Pigdog Journal has will be focused on this story. Whether it is enough to prevent the human race from being "Assimilated" by those damn clever Ay-leens is doubtful... so we need your help. If you find any information about these Ay-leen and their nefarious plans write to us.
If you want to read the lame-ass cover story for this debacle you can...
T O P S T O R I E S
America's National Recording Registry Inducts Culturally Significant Artist - Weezer!
America's Library of Congress calls them "defining sounds of history and culture" and "audio treasures worthy of preservation for all time based on their cultural, historical or aesthetic importance in the nation’s recorded sound heritage." Ladies and gentlemen, I give you... Weezer! (More...)
The Crossroads are real and The Blues is a place; The enduring myth of Robert Johnson (More...)
California Glory Hole attracts huge crowds
A glory hole at Napa's Lake Berryessa is drawing huge crowds. According to Chris Lee, the general manager for the Solano County Water Agency, the glory hole hasn't been active since 2019, and only restarted operations on Feb 4. (More...)
Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
Republican State Senator Justin Eichorn of Minnesota was arrested for soliciting a teen girl on Monday just hours after he introduced a bill proposing "Trump derangement syndrome" (TDS) as a form of mental illness. (More...)
Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
The parents of a Texas girl who died from the measles are defending their decision not to vaccinate their daughter. "She says they would still say 'Don't do the shots,'" an unidentified translator for the parents said. "They think it’s not as bad as the media is making it out to be." (More...)
Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
"I'm mayor now" said write-in mayoral candidate and founder of Pirate’s Booty Snacks Robert Ehrlich after losing the election for Mayor of Sea Cliff, NY. Then he tried to take over the Village Hall and fire everyone. (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
Paranoid Strippers & Psychotic Crack Dealers (Tales of Christmas Eve)
Christmas day, for the last 17 or so years has bored me. I find that the real fun and excitement always takes place on Christmas Eve. Every other year, it's the excitement of the metaphorical hunt instead of the kill. Otherwise, it's just plain bad craziness. (More...)
Three Days and 25 Spocktails: A Cautionary Tale
Johnnie Royale picked me up from the dental surgery. I felt warm, safe, cradled in the anathesia's loving embrace. The pharmacy downstairs gave me a bottle of Vicodin and a few instructions: take it with food, don't mix with alcohol, don't operate heavy machinery. I put it in my pocket and we left. "Do you want to go home, or do you want to go to a bar?" asked Johnnie. (More...)
Experimenter is a film released in 2015 starring Peter Sarsgaard. It tells the story of Dr. Stanley Milgram's life, including the infamous Milgram electric shock experiment, tests on crowds, and his work developing a theory on the mechanics of social networks. It currently streams on Netflix. (More...)
Patient Joab's scientifick editorial discusses aspect of the space-time-beer continuum never before processed by sub-bush-robot minds!!! Too fabulantastic to contempulate! (More...)
Skunk School -- Learn Why Not To Keep Skunks As Pets
There is an alarming trend in pet purchasing habits this fall. People inspired by the WWII film, "Life is Beautiful" -- the one with that annoying Italian guy -- are buying descented skunks by the millions. (More...)
Canadia Revealed: A Brief Guide to a Large Country
Recently Pigdog has received many letters from readers who are apparently puzzled and upset by our regular coverage of the mysterious nation north of our border, Canadia. (More...)
