Build Date: Sat Feb 24 08:30:21 2024 UTC

I've got a bottle of Swathmore Vinyards Merlot from South Africa sitting here that I could open right now. But I'm saving it, see. That's how much control I have.
-- Ratsnatcher

Alien Attacks Dog!!!

by El Snatcher

1998-11-11 02:55:00

There's a new report of a case of a man who was walking his dog in the woods when suddenly an alien popped out, and viciously killed and mutilated his dog. The man became OUTRAGED, and bashed the alien to death with a large tree branch. MIBs were involved... some mysterious deaths... and the alien body got stolen along the way. But not before the man managed to snap some fantastic pictures of the gruesome remains of the alien and its flying saucer!!! He even managed to record its death scream!

There's something comforting in the idea that you can just swack an alien across the head and split its skull open...

This reminds me of the UPN hoax-o-tainment abduction show, "Alien Abduction - Incident at Lake County" ( that ran on UPN about a year ago. It was about the McPhearson hillbilly family who were terrorized and abused by aliens, but fought back by shooting at them with big shotguns. Way to go!!

Perhaps these aliens aren't as scary they might appear at first glance. If they can be conquered by hillbillies with clubs and shotguns, what we need is more hillbillies. No wonder those aliens are hiding from us.

Over.  End of Story.  Go home now.

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