Build Date: Wed Sep 11 08:40:07 2024 UTC
Better seek treatment before you start imagining that Marilyn Monroe is your mom.
-- Master Squid
Keep Your Hands Off of My PC
2002-03-02 19:23:01
In a screeching rant that would make any PDJ author proud, Thom Greene of The Register rips into Senator Hollings (D - SC) and his ludicrous "dog and pony" SSSCA hearings Hollings held early this week.
As most PDJ readers know, any PC that would be legal under the SSSCA would be rendered to nothing more then an expensive VCR/CD that crashed on a regular basis (just to remind you that Microsoft Windows was Inside.) Any sort of real and effective anti-copy protection requires the hardware and the operating system to distrust and disallow all but "validated" programs, applications and content. Under the SSSCA, if some byte hasn't been blessed by one of the few privileged multi-national corporations allowed to bless bytes, you can bet your sweet ass that "your" PC will choke on it. Your PC will probably also be programmed to alert your local police department that you've been practicing unsafe computing. And Linux will never, ever qualify as an SSSCA approved product.
An Intel VP, Leslie Vadasz, echoed this thought, in an uncharacteristic moment of sanity in Sen. Hollings' private little hearing room - which is really more of country club, where only the most generous donors are permitted membership and allowed to speak. And for his efforts, Sen. Hollings berated Vadasz for not marching to the corporate drum. Or at least Sen. Hollings' corporate drum.
First elected in 1966, Sen. Hollings is rapidly setting himself up to become the poster boy of Senatorial term limits. Oblivious to the technical revolution of the past 40 years and obviously in the pocket of his corporate masters, it appears that Hollings is willing to destroy the personal freedoms of millions of computer using Americans, along with permanently crippling US technical leadership in this field, all for just the few shekels the MPAA and RIAA tossed into to his re-election basket.
I'd tell you to write to Senator Hollings and inform him just what a bad idea the SSSCA is, but it is clear that Sen. Hollings thinks that anyone that wants to copy a file or write a program or just use a computer in an "unapproved" fashion is a criminal that should be heavily fined and then locked up. So instead, I urge you to join the EFF and fight for your rights.
Those evil bastards in the House and Senate might have slipped the DMCA over on us when we weren't watching, but not this time... not this time. And we certainly might lose fight against the SSSCA, but at least we'll be watching and protesting. I certainly plan to make myself as annoying as possible to those that support the SSSCA and won't be watching the SSSCA become law with any shred of probity or dignity remaining.
T O P S T O R I E S
Another Nobel Prize-Winning Author Describes Drunkenness
This book won a Pulitzer Prize. Here's its famous paragraph on getting drunk... (More...)
'Why I'm pretty sure JD Vance had sex with a couch'
True or false? The answers await us in that magical land where all truths are revealed -- the internet. (More...)
In 2010 Dr. Cheng-Huai Ruan discovered a way to cause a patient with an abnormal heartbeat to get back into a normal rhythm by sticking a finger up the patient's ass. (More...)
WKRP in Cincinnati aired from 1978 through 1982. Howard Hesseman played Dr. Johnny Fever, a DJ from Los Angeles who was fired from his previous job for saying the word "booger" on the air. In the show Hesseman would do some dialogue, introduce a song, and start the song. You'd hear a few notes, but never the whole song. (More...)
SF Hippies Can't Get Their Act Together
The annual 420 Hippie Hill event in Golden Gate Park, where large crowds of hippies, wannabe hippies, and hippie poseurs drape themselves in tie dye t-shirts and gather on a hill on 4/20 to smoke weed, was cancelled this year because the organizers couldn't get their act together. (More...)
Mozart to be inducted into the Rock 'n Roll Hall of Fame
Joining such hard-rocking inductees as Abba, Chet Atkins, Nat King Cole, and Neil Diamond, the Rock 'n Roll Hall of Fame is proud to induct Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart. (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
Still Up For the Party? America's Dance Floors Are Graying
Raving over 30 doesn't have to be embarassing anymore. (More...)
We here at Spock Mountain Research Labs (SMRL - world leaders in beverage research and leisure technology) have been noting some complaints about a few of the last Spocktails recipes we’ve released to the general public. Some complaints received to barfback and pigdog-l have centered around the opinion that no one in their right minds would make the drink in question much less consume it. (More...)
NASA's Mars missions keep blowing up and crashing, but dammit, when you reach for the stars you have to expect a few minor setbacks. Drink a toast to the men and women of NASA! Toast them with a Lost Probe mixed up with your own two (or three) hands! (More...)
Songs Of Love And Special Things
Well, dear reader, there's no denying it: Spring has sprung. The air is pungent with the fertile aroma of Romance. And you know what goes with Romance, don't you? That's right, Lover, porn. And not just any porn, but the kind you can sing along to. (More...)
This week: another fine spocktail from the beverage researchers at SMRL! Drink it in peace, because WE DID THE RESEARCH! (More...)
The Peppermill Is Not Good For You
Paradise lounge on the strip. Expense it, bad boy! (More...)