Build Date: Fri Aug 29 05:50:11 2025 UTC
I say we nuke Canadia 'til it glows.
-- Johnnie Royale
George W. Bush Confronts Online Insurrection
2001-08-08 13:24:27
You can't have political dissent without a MIDI playing Devo's "Whip It." See George W. Bush! Dancing! In a tutu! In blue boxer shorts!
Disrespect is inevitable for any President, let alone an inarticulate lightweight who stole the election. But why squirm helplessly in electoral powerlessness when you can fuse political commentary to the Hamsterdance. Elsewhere on the web, surfers can even pow-wow with the interactive dancing George W. Bush. Select from a menu of disco moves and disco lights!
The "dancing Bush" gag gets old after a while -- as yet-another wacky webmaster throws in Dick Cheney in Speedos. But for a jarring juxtaposition, they've added at the bottom of the page "Help prevent drunk driving." They're serious. The link leads to one of those scary Sunday school poems. ("I went to a party, and remembered what you said. You told me not to drink, Mom, so I had a Sprite instead....") In earnest all-capital letters, they even plead "WE ARE HOPING TO GET 5,000 SIGNATURES ON THIS, THEN PASS IT ON TO THE PRESIDENT." Maybe they can include one of those naked dancing Al Gore/Chippendale images, too. I'm sure the drunk-driving President and his stop sign-running wife will be receptive.
Living under the reign of a malevolent usurper, the unwashed masses grow turbulent. In an ugly rainbow of festering disempowerment, they create an ad hoc online town meeting where the obscure meet the disobedient in a summit of bad folk art. Alternating waves of rebellion and apathy, the throng congregates endlessly, sending each other talking postcards from Dress'em up Dubya, and secretly wishing their President was Hunter S. Thompson.
T O P S T O R I E S
California Glory Hole attracts huge crowds
A glory hole at Napa's Lake Berryessa is drawing huge crowds. According to Chris Lee, the general manager for the Solano County Water Agency, the glory hole hasn't been active since 2019, and only restarted operations on Feb 4. (More...)
Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
Republican State Senator Justin Eichorn of Minnesota was arrested for soliciting a teen girl on Monday just hours after he introduced a bill proposing "Trump derangement syndrome" (TDS) as a form of mental illness. (More...)
Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
The parents of a Texas girl who died from the measles are defending their decision not to vaccinate their daughter. "She says they would still say 'Don't do the shots,'" an unidentified translator for the parents said. "They think it’s not as bad as the media is making it out to be." (More...)
Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
"I'm mayor now" said write-in mayoral candidate and founder of Pirate’s Booty Snacks Robert Ehrlich after losing the election for Mayor of Sea Cliff, NY. Then he tried to take over the Village Hall and fire everyone. (More...)
Musk claims Xitter security is staffed by idiots
Earlier this month Xitter experienced a massive outage. In an interview, Musk told Fox Business that he believes the attack came from "IP addresses originating in the Ukraine area." (More...)
The Future Ain't What It Used To Be
Ideas have taken horrifying shape and rooted into our modern reality. (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
Skunk School -- Learn Why Not To Keep Skunks As Pets
There is an alarming trend in pet purchasing habits this fall. People inspired by the WWII film, "Life is Beautiful" -- the one with that annoying Italian guy -- are buying descented skunks by the millions. (More...)
A Blast from the Past! Pao Tzu goes over and under the crucial variables in the production and consumption of Salvia Divinorum. A must read for psychonauts of all stripes. (More...)
During a magnificent sunny day in a fast receding autumn, the Spock Science Monitor reporters once again blew the playa dust off of their computers and covered the 2002 Burning Man Decompression – held every year just east of Portola Hill in beautiful San Francisco. Both an afternoon and evening issues were released to the unsuspecting crowd of freaks attempting to in some small way experience the euphoria of the playa – if but for a brief afternoon far from the desolation of Northern Nevada. (More...)
The Liquidation of Hobo Junction
Albany, CA's homeless hooverville by the Bay, "Hobo Junction," is going to be torn down by The Man. Entrances are already being blocked off, and it's now difficult and dangerous to get there. Worse, these obstacles are making it hard to get to the nearby HORSE TRACK on foot. Local historian, Pao Tzu, has an overview of situation. (More...)
Australian Troops Set for Days of Debauchery to the Tunes of Kylie Minogue
This weekend Australian troops in East Timor will be able to put their feet up and push all the images of mass graves and charred remains from their minds as they relax to the giddy melodies of Kylie Minogue - including exclusive unplugged performances in the militia-ravaged and blood-spattered border towns of Balibo and Suai. (More...)
I just came across this coolio essay by Pigdog Journal Science Editor binky wedged between two staves in the back corner of the submissions barrel. It's on the origin of the cyberbilly and is definitely de rigeur for any serious student of this fascinating sociological movement. (More...)
