Build Date: Thu Aug 20 06:40:20 2026 UTC
The Library of Short Russian Novels is the smallest library ever.
-- Master Squid
George W. Bush Confronts Online Insurrection
2001-08-08 13:24:27
You can't have political dissent without a MIDI playing Devo's "Whip It." See George W. Bush! Dancing! In a tutu! In blue boxer shorts!
Disrespect is inevitable for any President, let alone an inarticulate lightweight who stole the election. But why squirm helplessly in electoral powerlessness when you can fuse political commentary to the Hamsterdance. Elsewhere on the web, surfers can even pow-wow with the interactive dancing George W. Bush. Select from a menu of disco moves and disco lights!
The "dancing Bush" gag gets old after a while -- as yet-another wacky webmaster throws in Dick Cheney in Speedos. But for a jarring juxtaposition, they've added at the bottom of the page "Help prevent drunk driving." They're serious. The link leads to one of those scary Sunday school poems. ("I went to a party, and remembered what you said. You told me not to drink, Mom, so I had a Sprite instead....") In earnest all-capital letters, they even plead "WE ARE HOPING TO GET 5,000 SIGNATURES ON THIS, THEN PASS IT ON TO THE PRESIDENT." Maybe they can include one of those naked dancing Al Gore/Chippendale images, too. I'm sure the drunk-driving President and his stop sign-running wife will be receptive.
Living under the reign of a malevolent usurper, the unwashed masses grow turbulent. In an ugly rainbow of festering disempowerment, they create an ad hoc online town meeting where the obscure meet the disobedient in a summit of bad folk art. Alternating waves of rebellion and apathy, the throng congregates endlessly, sending each other talking postcards from Dress'em up Dubya, and secretly wishing their President was Hunter S. Thompson.
T O P S T O R I E S
John Dvorak has passed. I’m of mixed emotions. First off I’m more positive about his contribution to the overall technology journalism of the early PC days through the 90s, despite how many things he got wrong. He was a firebrand and commanded attention. (More...)
America's National Recording Registry Inducts Culturally Significant Artist - Weezer!
America's Library of Congress calls them "defining sounds of history and culture" and "audio treasures worthy of preservation for all time based on their cultural, historical or aesthetic importance in the nation’s recorded sound heritage." Ladies and gentlemen, I give you... Weezer! (More...)
The Crossroads are real and The Blues is a place; The enduring myth of Robert Johnson (More...)
California Glory Hole attracts huge crowds
A glory hole at Napa's Lake Berryessa is drawing huge crowds. According to Chris Lee, the general manager for the Solano County Water Agency, the glory hole hasn't been active since 2019, and only restarted operations on Feb 4. (More...)
Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
Republican State Senator Justin Eichorn of Minnesota was arrested for soliciting a teen girl on Monday just hours after he introduced a bill proposing "Trump derangement syndrome" (TDS) as a form of mental illness. (More...)
Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
The parents of a Texas girl who died from the measles are defending their decision not to vaccinate their daughter. "She says they would still say 'Don't do the shots,'" an unidentified translator for the parents said. "They think it’s not as bad as the media is making it out to be." (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
Pigdog dispatched special correspondent Ratsnatcher for a holiday reconnaissance of America's frozen hell. After ten days of silence, our shortwave radio cackled with Ratsnatcher's static-filled transmission. (More...)
Vacationing from Somnambulant Narrow Realities
So about six months ago, I was chilling in Chang Mai, Thailand with ICBINJ, perursing the Bangkok Times over my banana pancake and Big Chang breakfast when I spotted this article reprinted from the LA Times. It was about some kooks from California (where else?) who were claiming to have been to the front lines in Afgahnistan in mid-December and had recorded the whole feat on their website. "Holy Fuck!" I thought, "Now That's web journalism. Who are these guys!?" (More...)
It’s election night. My wife and I are holed-up in this hotel that my political party has rented out for the evening. Outside, people are being violently beaten for whom they voted for. Is this South Africa? Perhaps we’re in Haiti or some Southern state during the 60’s. Of all the places where this sort of thing happens, it’s mind-boggling that we are in Portland, Maine. (More...)
Patient Joab's scientifick editorial discusses aspect of the space-time-beer continuum never before processed by sub-bush-robot minds!!! Too fabulantastic to contempulate! (More...)
Yet another delicious SPOCKTAIL from the SMRL Beverage Science Labs! Check under the cap for your chance to win thousands of fabulous prizes! (More...)
Three Days and 25 Spocktails: A Cautionary Tale
Johnnie Royale picked me up from the dental surgery. I felt warm, safe, cradled in the anathesia's loving embrace. The pharmacy downstairs gave me a bottle of Vicodin and a few instructions: take it with food, don't mix with alcohol, don't operate heavy machinery. I put it in my pocket and we left. "Do you want to go home, or do you want to go to a bar?" asked Johnnie. (More...)
