Build Date: Fri Jun 20 22:00:34 2025 UTC
Last time a girl flirted with me like that on IRC, I ended up in Chicago.
-- Johnnie Royale
What's Your Debian Package Name?
2002-5-26 19:30:11
Hey, so, we all know and love that beautiful and successful Linux distribution, Debian GNU/Linux, right? The new Debian 3.0 (woody) is coming out Real Soon Now, and it's going to feature over NINE THOUSAND software packages. That's a lot of software!
And I know a lot of people out there are like me. We look at all those packages, line after line in dselect, and we think, "Geez, I wonder what my name would be, if I were a Free Software package and someone made me part of Debian?" Well, WONDER NO MORE! Because we have the ANSWER!
Here's how it works: you enter your name (birth name, IRC nick, pet name, doesn't matter) in the form below. Then, hit the SUPER FANCY DEBIANIZING BUTTON, and you will find out! What your name would be! If you were a Debian package! Beaujolais!
T O P S T O R I E S
California Glory Hole attracts huge crowds
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Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
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Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
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Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
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Musk claims Xitter security is staffed by idiots
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The Future Ain't What It Used To Be
Ideas have taken horrifying shape and rooted into our modern reality. (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
There are two kinds of Assmen in this world. Wild, hairy assmen, who put stickers that say things like "Why Be Normal?" all over their trucks and drink Corona beer and wear fezzes at parties for attention; these are the Assman Desperados. Our job is to ferret them out and expose them. (More...)
The Deep Dark Underbelly of the Star Wars Myth, or Ramayana Remembered
It's a fact: Star Wars is a blatant plagiarism of an ancient Asian legend, and the long lines of devout Star Wars freaks are really unscrupulous Asian copyright busters. From Indonesia to Thailand to Nepal, videos are available for sale or rent before they're even released in the US and UK due to this nerdy camcorder-clutching bunch. (More...)
Johnnie Royale's Guide to Wakes
Wakes can present problems for Bad People of the Future. (If you don't know what a BPotF is, you need to read more of the PDJ.) Sure, your friend is gone and you miss him and that really sucks; it does, I know. But all Bad People of the Future are gonna die, and they have all accepted that fact. They do deserve, however, to have one final kickass party to celebrate all the bad things they've done in the past, present and future. And you, as a friend, have to make sure that their desire for a final send off is well executed (sorry for the pun). That's just the way of BPotFdom. (More...)
From the mixed up files of citizen 566-77-0776 (More...)
This week: another fine spocktail from the beverage researchers at SMRL! Drink it in peace, because WE DID THE RESEARCH! (More...)
Another Spocktail from the beverage researchers at SMRL: Home of The Deathwave Bar & Grill! (More...)
