Build Date: Wed Oct 29 00:30:26 2025 UTC
Once you accept the Bozo that is within yourself, you can accept the Bozo that is within us ALL. And they all had the best Christmas ever.
-- Tjames Madison
Beaujolais, Baby!
Pigdog Journal Articles
2011-03-01
Normally enjoyed for it's quick buzz and skull-crack hangover, Beaujolais is not known as a wine savored so much as swilled. That may be changing because Georges Duboeuf Morgon Domaine Mont Chavy 2009 Beaujolais was named French wine of the year by some wine snob. Whether that means that this Beaujolais is a fine wine or that every other French offering tastes like donkey ball sweat is a matter of opinion.
2001-11-14
Man! Time flies when you're a big drunk! Feels like I just got over last years Beaujolais Nouveau hangover. A full 24 hours before the official start of Beaujolais Nouveau, Pigdog Journal brings you a sneak-peak, behind-the-scenes exclusive preview of what the critics are saying about this years Beaujolais Nouveau:
2001-02-12
PETA (No, not the People for Eating Tasty Animals, the OTHER PETA, the one with no sense of humor), has decided to CAVE IN to pressure from Mothers Against Drunk Drivers and ABANDON the ABSOLUTE BEST IDEA they ever came up with.
2000-11-15
Can you believe it's here again already? It hardly seems that a year has passed since the BEAUJOLAIS NOUVEAU was last unleashed on an unwitting world. The shards of glass have hardly been swept up, the wounds have barely healed, and the DIABOLICAL WINEMONGERERS of the Beaujolais region are already going to flood us with bacchanalian vino! Where is the justice!?
1999-11-17
It's that time of year again, my delicieux friend! Yes indeed! The BEAUJOLAIS NOUVEAU is upon us! For the last time this CENTURY! And I must say, BEAUJOLAIS to that!!
1999-11-11
A University of Minnesota researcher (and noted expert) announced his finding this week at a meeting of the American Public Health Association that most bartenders ignore state laws and serve the very drunk. I'd like to ask everyone to take a moment and thank the good Lord for these fine, brave men, without whom we, the very very drunk, we be cruelly cut off from our nourishing supply of booze.
1999-06-11
Police hit a moonshine jackpot behind Douglas Bethune's single wide trailer outside of Benson, North Carolina (pop. 2810) last October -- finding and destroying 6,400 gallons of white lightnin' with a street value of $16,000.
1999-06-10
Far from the refined, cultured, expensive wine drinking snobs they like to portray themselves as, the French are actually a nation of cheap, off the shelf wine buyers, according to the results of a new study on wine purchasing habits.
1998-11-18
It's finally here! Beaujolais Day! The third Thursday in November is by tradition Beaujolais Day, the first day you can buy the latest vintage of Beaujolais (called "Beaujolais Nouveau"). All around the world, time zone after time zone, as the clock hit midnight, closely-guarded bottles of Beaujolais were opened and tasted for the first time. Hooray for that!
Offsite links shared by staff writers
2011-03-03
2005-04-26
2002-03-02
Stop and smell the goddamn roses, people!
2001-12-19
When 900 years drunk you be, look this good you will not.
1999-09-26
T O P S T O R I E S
California Glory Hole attracts huge crowds
A glory hole at Napa's Lake Berryessa is drawing huge crowds. According to Chris Lee, the general manager for the Solano County Water Agency, the glory hole hasn't been active since 2019, and only restarted operations on Feb 4. (More...)
Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
Republican State Senator Justin Eichorn of Minnesota was arrested for soliciting a teen girl on Monday just hours after he introduced a bill proposing "Trump derangement syndrome" (TDS) as a form of mental illness. (More...)
Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
The parents of a Texas girl who died from the measles are defending their decision not to vaccinate their daughter. "She says they would still say 'Don't do the shots,'" an unidentified translator for the parents said. "They think it’s not as bad as the media is making it out to be." (More...)
Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
"I'm mayor now" said write-in mayoral candidate and founder of Pirate’s Booty Snacks Robert Ehrlich after losing the election for Mayor of Sea Cliff, NY. Then he tried to take over the Village Hall and fire everyone. (More...)
Musk claims Xitter security is staffed by idiots
Earlier this month Xitter experienced a massive outage. In an interview, Musk told Fox Business that he believes the attack came from "IP addresses originating in the Ukraine area." (More...)
The Future Ain't What It Used To Be
Ideas have taken horrifying shape and rooted into our modern reality. (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
Pao Tzu: Obtaining San Pedro Cactus
Horticultural clone master, Pao Tzu, guides you through the ins and outs of stealing hallucinogenic cacti from your neighbors' yards. Ooh la la! (More...)
This is one for the Ages. Our new signature SMRL drink. We beta tested this several weeks ago at the Goat Brothers B-Day Party. Oh my! (More...)
Poor Metallica. All they want is to continue to put out the same weak "Heavy Metal" they've been churning out since the "And Justice For All" days? and make gooey wads of cash in the process. The problem is, people aren't buying their bound for the heavy metal scrap heap, over-produced, uninspired, tired crap. And let's face it, their various commercial endorsements won't pay for the lifestyle they've become comfortably accustomed to. Resorting to lawsuits makes perfect sense, when you need spending money. But just one lawsuit isn't going to pay their bills. So, to aid Metallica, I've composed an open letter to the boys in the band, with suggestions as to whom else they might sic their lapdog lawyers on... (More...)
Johnnie Royale's Guide to Wakes
Wakes can present problems for Bad People of the Future. (If you don't know what a BPotF is, you need to read more of the PDJ.) Sure, your friend is gone and you miss him and that really sucks; it does, I know. But all Bad People of the Future are gonna die, and they have all accepted that fact. They do deserve, however, to have one final kickass party to celebrate all the bad things they've done in the past, present and future. And you, as a friend, have to make sure that their desire for a final send off is well executed (sorry for the pun). That's just the way of BPotFdom. (More...)
Patient Joab's scientifick editorial discusses aspect of the space-time-beer continuum never before processed by sub-bush-robot minds!!! Too fabulantastic to contempulate! (More...)
