Build Date: Wed Feb 21 13:40:53 2024 UTC

Goddamn Fox News online is impossible to read through all the ads. They are fucking their own readers SO HARD.
-- Master Squid

Crackdown!

The Justice Department is being run by a political appointee of George Bush who was so disliked in his home state of Missouri that in 2000 he lost an election to a dead man. Now he gets to decide which freedoms people should sacrifice in the name of security.

I'm Gonna Git You, Sucka!

Pigdog Journal Articles

2007-09-09

Alex Jones manhandled and arrested on trumped-up charges by NYPD!
Last night in New York City, a big monster cop raced into a crowd of demonstrators during an early street action for the 9/11 anniversary, specifically singling out documentary filmmaker and popular talk show host, Alex Jones, and handcuffed him with extreme prejudice and excessive grunting, nearly chopping the media activist's hands off. -- El Snatcher

2006-03-01

Anal Flashlight Rape Protects Freedom
Former Attorney General John Ashcroft said he makes "no apologies" for finding every legal way to protect the public, which includes anally-raping suspects with flashlights until their asses bleed. -- Baron Earl

2006-02-17

Critcism of the Bush Administration is Sedition
The U.S. Department of Veteran's Affairs is investigating Laura Berg, one of their staffers, for the crime of sedition after Berg wrote a "letter to the editor" in a local Albuquerque paper criticising the Bush Administration. -- Baron Earl

2005-12-19

Bush Orders Wiretaps
When asked about his authorization of wiretaps within the United States today, President Bush responded "Do I have the legal authority to do this? And the answer is, absolutely." Considering the past mistakes and omissions of this administration it's worthwhile to check and see if what the President says is true. Unsurprisingly, he's wrong again. -- Baron Earl

2005-12-08

Air Marshals Act To Reduce Medicare Costs
Reducing the Medicare rolls one nut at a time. -- binky

2005-02-10

Ammunition in the Class War
So, you're lighting some candles (and maybe a fattie) for your niece's second birthday, when all of a sudden you are instantly transported into the last ten minutes of True Romance. Only it's way less fun, because, well, your kids are about to get a cap busted in their baby asses and you don't have Christian Slater there to be So Cool and save the day. -- Dkr. Armand Geddyn

2003-04-23

Free Mike Hawash!
So, you're coming home from work, when suddenly armed government agents show up in the parking lot and take you away to prison. They also send a team, armed with assault rifles and bulletproof vests, into your home to confront your wife and kids. You don't know what you possibly could have done, and nobody will tell you anything. You stay in prison. Weeks go by. -- Siduri

2002-09-10

The Impotence of Being Dick
Some of you have come to think of Cheney as the Invisible Man, while others of you cannot shake the image of No Hair the Pirate. This naturally depends on whether you want to ask him questions about his Halliburton dealings or if you want to add more viscosity to his already greasy palm. While the debate rages about actual existence of Cheney's heart (say, wasn't that surgery to install rather than repair?), developments in Cheney's apocalyptic cheerleading demonstrate something that Mrs. Cheney has known for years: the li'l Dick hasn't worked since the day Richard Nixon resigned. -- Reverend CyberSatan

2002-08-09

Woman Forced to Drink Own Breast Milk
One recent addition to airport security measures has been to force passengers to take a sip from any open containers of liquids they may be carrying, to prove that the liquid is harmless. The law of unintended consequences was in full force when a Long Island woman was forced to drink from each of three bottles of her own breast milk in front of other passengers before boarding her plane. -- Baron Earl

2002-07-27

I Don't Feel Any Safer
A woman is suing Delta Airlines for publicly humiliating her after a vibrator she bought in Las Vegas started buzzing in her luggage. -- Baron Earl

Offsite links shared by staff writers

2023-10-08

2002-08-16

Big Brother 2002 -- Baron Earl

2002-08-15

Over.  End of Story.  Go home now.

T O P   S T O R I E S

The Awl

C L A S S I C   P I G D O G

Quickies