New Years Eve Anxiety
1999-12-31 22:31:12
I woke up this morning thinking "Wow, this is it, the last day before the year 2000."
I've been thinking about this day for a long time. When I was a little kid I calculated just how old I was going to be on New Year's Eve 1999. Very OLD, it seemed then.
Today I'm excited and anxious. I'm not too worried about the Y2K bug. I figure we'll have glitches and inconvieniences galore, but I don't expect major, catastrophic system failures.
I figure several groups of religious nuts will commit mass suicide because they got tired of waiting for God to show up. It's sad but hey, good riddance. I feel sorry for their kids, who will undoubtedly be killed off by their own parents so they can also experience God's Glory without the wait. I expect lots of hand-wringing fake-sincere TV coverage of the suicide sites, with a reporter looking on, all solemn and attempting dignity.
I feel especially sorry for those who will be killed by the religious crusaders who want to take some people with them, which is why I plan to party the night away in a place where I hope the zealots will not be doing their dirty work. I expect endless hours of news explaining how the crusaders did what they did and what steps are being taken by authorities to keep this from happening in the future. I do not expect to hear any thoughts on how we can build a world where people won't feel the need to kill people they've never met.
Then of course there are the assorted militia nuts, terrorist cells, and political freedom fighters who figure that New Years Eve 1999 is the perfect time to maim, kill, and destroy property... in the name of freedom and justice of course. I hope the damage they cause is minimal and the lives they wreck are few. I also hope that at least some of them manage to blow themselves up with their bombs, because I love a news story with lots of irony.
I know I can watch it all appear live, on CNN, on FOX, on ABC, NBC, and CBS. I can sit safe in my living room and watch bits and pieces of the world shatter and die. Then on Saturday we can sit back and reflect on just how few of the failures were related to technology, and how many had their origins in abnormal human psychology.
The end will be covered live on TV. It will not be the end.

T O P S T O R I E S
The Crossroads are real and The Blues is a place; The enduring myth of Robert Johnson (More...)
California Glory Hole attracts huge crowds
A glory hole at Napa's Lake Berryessa is drawing huge crowds. According to Chris Lee, the general manager for the Solano County Water Agency, the glory hole hasn't been active since 2019, and only restarted operations on Feb 4. (More...)
Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
Republican State Senator Justin Eichorn of Minnesota was arrested for soliciting a teen girl on Monday just hours after he introduced a bill proposing "Trump derangement syndrome" (TDS) as a form of mental illness. (More...)
Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
The parents of a Texas girl who died from the measles are defending their decision not to vaccinate their daughter. "She says they would still say 'Don't do the shots,'" an unidentified translator for the parents said. "They think it’s not as bad as the media is making it out to be." (More...)
Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
"I'm mayor now" said write-in mayoral candidate and founder of Pirate’s Booty Snacks Robert Ehrlich after losing the election for Mayor of Sea Cliff, NY. Then he tried to take over the Village Hall and fire everyone. (More...)
Musk claims Xitter security is staffed by idiots
Earlier this month Xitter experienced a massive outage. In an interview, Musk told Fox Business that he believes the attack came from "IP addresses originating in the Ukraine area." (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
Spock Went, Spock Wrote, Spock Kicked Ass
Every Labor Day weekend a large portion of the PDJ staff joins 30,000 other freaks at one of the biggest and strangest art festivals in the world - Burning Man - somewhere on the edge of the Black Rock Desert. Our base of operations is always the ultra swank Spock Mountain Research Labs - the World Leaders in Beverage Science and Leisure Technology. This year, we hauled up our computers, printers and a massive digital duplicator, determined to become Black Rock City's third daily newspaper. Even Spock was surprised by our success - news will never be viewed the same on the playa. Read all seven issues of the 2002 Spock Science Monitor for yourself and see why. (More...)
Report from Spiritual Machines
Arkuat gives you the inside scoop on the "Spiritual Machines" panel and conclave. Wacky excitement ensues! (More...)
Patient Joab's scientifick editorial discusses aspect of the space-time-beer continuum never before processed by sub-bush-robot minds!!! Too fabulantastic to contempulate! (More...)
The Liquidation of Hobo Junction
Albany, CA's homeless hooverville by the Bay, "Hobo Junction," is going to be torn down by The Man. Entrances are already being blocked off, and it's now difficult and dangerous to get there. Worse, these obstacles are making it hard to get to the nearby HORSE TRACK on foot. Local historian, Pao Tzu, has an overview of situation. (More...)
Our team of crack journalists went insane, and made the drive from Concord, California to Concord, New Hasmpshire on Interstate 80. Read the insightful observations of our intrepid travelers made on their journey into the heartland. (More...)
It was early in May last year when I first heard about Spock Mountain Research Labs. I was working on a story about a Hungarian scientist's new approach to nucleopeptide synthesis when I got a call from my friend Albert. (More...)