Slashdot.org

     
 

iPad2 brings new possibilities for porn
2011-03-02 21:34:46


Would You Like Fetish With That?
 
i am now a bitch with a five pound cunt. i am proud.
-- rotten elf

 

All of San Francisco's most cutting-edge masturbators gathered at the Yerba Buena Center for the Arts today for the unveiling of the iPad2 from Apple, a device which promises to revolutionize porn creation and delivery.

With cameras on both the front and back the iPad2 can allow a chronic masturbator to capture both their facial expressions and dangly bits at the same time. When editing the footage with iMovie the junk pumper can quickly switch from one shot to the other with no loss of continuity. By putting all of the pieces together in one easy-to-use platform Apple has cut the time from bodily-release to RedTube-release to a matter of minutes.

The accessories industry hasn't missed a beat either, as manufacturers simultaneously release over 10 different fluid-proof cases just today.

Meanwhile porn industry engineers continue to embrace HTML5 in an effort to get porn from their servers to your iPad. Steve Jobs may want to keep the iPad porn-free, but there's a larger effort being spent to provide free porn.

Over.  End of Story.  Go home now.

mustard@pigdog.org


comments powered by Disqus
 
     

 

T O P   S T O R I E S

Giant Space Penises
by Baron Earl

Ted Nelson's Junk Mail
by Baron Earl

Slap Kirk!
by Baron Earl

The End of the World
by Baron Earl

03-23

El Destino

The Las Vegas Strip now has robot bartenders

03-06

Poindexter Fortran

University of California special collections: now with more Hunter S. Thompson

02-15

Baron Earl

Amazing hand-stitched scenes from DUNE

01-17

Baron Earl

Contributions to Top Dark Money Spenders

01-11

Baron Earl

CES claims dildo is not a robot

01-11

Baron Earl

Rep. Steve King wonders how the phrase "white supremacist" became "offensive"

09-29

El Destino

Zeitgeist's Legendary 'Tamale Lady' Dies Just Weeks Before Opening Her Long-Awaited Restaurant

02-23

Baron Earl

Cliff Burton Day in Castro Valley

02-23

El Destino

When Spock met PLATO

12-28

El Destino

A musical reminder: Don't Say GIF

More Quickies...