Build Date: Sun Jul 13 09:32:10 2025 UTC

Mankind is basically a battlefield... a dark cellar in which a well-bred spinster lady and a sex crazed monkey are forever engaged in mortal combat, the struggle being refereed by a rather nervous bank clerk.
-- D. Bannister

Enter the Seedy World of Rocket Belt Ownership

by Miles Standish

1999-08-10 10:45:07

As any maiden-kidnapping, wax-moustache-twiddling blackguard will tell you, the secret to success is removing the powers of those who would be your undoing. Especially when Rocket Boy is involved.

[Mr. Bad adds: This is a GREAT story about Bad People of the Future. They invented this crazy ROCKET BELT and but they were all mad at each other and got in a big HAMMER fight in their lab. WITH hammers! They were HITTING each other with HAMMERS!

So then one guy disappears with the ROCKET BELT, and the other guy hasn't seen the ROCKET BELT since! And it's like ROCKET BELT madness, looking for the ROCKET BELT!! In HOUSTON! Which has lots of rockets, so it's an easy place to hide a rocket belt and shit.

Mad scientists! Hammer brawling! ROCKET BELTS! If only this story had some ABSINTHE in it, it'd have EVERYTHING!]

Over.  End of Story.  Go home now.

laredo@pigdog.org

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