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Orange You Glad You're Alive?
1998-11-10 15:48:00

Weird Science
if EVERYONE were insane, i might have more fun.
-- rotten elf


The San Francisco Bay Guardian is reporting on a Florida biochemist who's developed THC-bearing oranges. Since oranges are not illegal (yet), you could theoretically get high from your morning glass of Sunny Delight. Unfortunately the Bad Guys have come down on this guy and stopped him from distributing his orange seeds to dopeheads until they have time to make it illegal.

I think this story is GREAT. First off, the guy developed the oranges out of VENGEANCE against the cops, who had confiscated his minivan because his kid had been picked up with a crappy pipe and a couple of seeds and stems. VENGEANCE is an excellent motivating factor and I applaud the scientist for his long-held grudge.

Second, I think every biochemist in the country should stop the boring stuff they're doing and work on putting bad drugs into fruits and vegetables. There should be drugs everywhere! If for nothing else, it makes the Feds look like idiots chasing guys like this down.

It's the high-tech equivalent of taking their little cop hats and throwing them around in a circle. "Look, there's some THC over here! And some over here too! Ha ha ha! Look at em run!" Anyways, I hope to see more of these interesting uses of biotech in the future.

Over.  End of Story.  Go home now.

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