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Beowulf Underground Subverts Decent Way of Life
1999-05-15 14:11:27

Weird Linux
This is the INTERNET, man. It was *built* by the AV crew.
-- Mr. Bad


The Beowulf Underground is an evil subversive group bent on destroying everything we hold dear and sacred as computerists. Instead of nice, compartmentalized machines that send terse and appropriate messages over thin wires, they want to have big MONGOLIAN CLUSTERFUCK computers with Aqualube and Free Love and Open Source and gooey money shots of data splurting EVERYWHERE. To them I say, Beaujolais!

Beowulf is the coolest thing to come down the pike in a long time. Hell, in terms of changing the world, I think it might even be more important than Linux. Beowulf is a clustering technology, meaning you can tie together a whole bunch of computers and they will look like one computer, with the combined strength of all the components.

In other words, you and I can take out of our closets all those lame dusty old computers with the long gray beards and bad coughs and the rheumatiz and put them all together into a brand new sexy SUPERMODEL computer with Stairmaster thighs and stunning white teeth. Wee-haw!

Clustering of computers is real cool. But Beowulf is OPEN SOURCE clustering, making it super-extra fancy cool. Unfortunately, Beowulf has come out of the academic environment, making any documentation about it REAL BORING. That's where the Beowulf Underground comes in. It's a cool new Web site that has lots of news and info about Beowulf. I must say, it is Da Bomb.

In fact, we're going to build a giant UBERCLUSTER with, like, 216 386 computers running Beowulf. We'll run Pigdog Journal off of it, and then people will get the great taste of Pigdog in record time! AND there's only one place to find out how to do this: BEOWULF UNDERGROUND. Go there NOW!

Over.  End of Story.  Go home now.


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