Time To Kick Up a Shitstorm!
2000-03-09 12:19:40
Howdy. Want t'hear some fine ass-kickin' Country music?
Undeniably, without Country Western music, thar'd not be Rock & Roll, ah reckon. It's unfo'tunate thet this hyar true musical fo'm of America has been glutted wif retarded inbreeds who reckon country moosic is by doin' a bad, watered-down imitashun of Lyynrrd Skynrrd (which th' cow-fuckers in Marketin' will tell yo' is called "yo'ng country"). Tune into enny C&W radio stashun. Th' chances of hearin' Waylon Jenning, Johnny Cash o' enny other of th' thousan's of ban's & indivijools playin' tradishunal (i.e. REAL) country music is about th' same as yo' bein' hit on th' haid by a meteo'ite bouncin' off th' surface of Pluto.
Thank Gawd fo' th' Internet.
Bypassin' all th' various marketin' sueyts, lovers of music is puttin' togither Internet radio shows. In this hyar particular case, Mr. Lucky & Gus sarve up hot & steamah servin's of C&W moosic on their show, Th' DoubleWide Hayride Show. Th' kind yo''d speck t'hear eff'n yo' were walkin' into honky-tonk on some back-road in Montana. So eff'n yo've gotten tired of th' blan' & bo'in' cookie-cutter crap put out by th' likes of Limp Muzik, tune in t'th' Hayride Show fo' proof thet thar's still fine moosic lef' in these here parts.

T O P S T O R I E S
The Crossroads are real and The Blues is a place; The enduring myth of Robert Johnson (More...)
California Glory Hole attracts huge crowds
A glory hole at Napa's Lake Berryessa is drawing huge crowds. According to Chris Lee, the general manager for the Solano County Water Agency, the glory hole hasn't been active since 2019, and only restarted operations on Feb 4. (More...)
Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
Republican State Senator Justin Eichorn of Minnesota was arrested for soliciting a teen girl on Monday just hours after he introduced a bill proposing "Trump derangement syndrome" (TDS) as a form of mental illness. (More...)
Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
The parents of a Texas girl who died from the measles are defending their decision not to vaccinate their daughter. "She says they would still say 'Don't do the shots,'" an unidentified translator for the parents said. "They think it’s not as bad as the media is making it out to be." (More...)
Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
"I'm mayor now" said write-in mayoral candidate and founder of Pirate’s Booty Snacks Robert Ehrlich after losing the election for Mayor of Sea Cliff, NY. Then he tried to take over the Village Hall and fire everyone. (More...)
Musk claims Xitter security is staffed by idiots
Earlier this month Xitter experienced a massive outage. In an interview, Musk told Fox Business that he believes the attack came from "IP addresses originating in the Ukraine area." (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
What the hell is going on with Sony?
Is anyone else as confused as I am with what's happening with the Sony Playstation network hack? (More...)
Ratsnatcher gets HOT HOT HOT in this classic road tale that looks at the steamy underworld of Bay Area Linux advocacy. Loosen your collar for this one! (More...)
Skunk School -- Learn Why Not To Keep Skunks As Pets
There is an alarming trend in pet purchasing habits this fall. People inspired by the WWII film, "Life is Beautiful" -- the one with that annoying Italian guy -- are buying descented skunks by the millions. (More...)
My experiment is a failure. Rockstar-and-Robitussin tastes like day-after-Halloween bile. I'm trying to choke down enough to discover the effects, but no matter what those are one thing is certain at the outset: what I have discovered is not a Beverage, but a pale green and angry iced abomination.
You were right: science is not for the weak of will nor stomach. (More...)
Patient Joab's scientifick editorial discusses aspect of the space-time-beer continuum never before processed by sub-bush-robot minds!!! Too fabulantastic to contempulate! (More...)