Build Date: Sun Apr 21 08:10:05 2024 UTC

I'm attacking you because it's FUN, dumbshit!
-- Tjames Madison

Dumb Brits in Love with Hamster Music

by Tjames Madison

1999-12-10 01:35:32

This is why we fought the king. The weirdo Brits are about to make a song featuring samples of the music from that stupid HamsterDance site their biggest-selling record of the holiday season.

The song, performed by a group called the Cuban Boys, was played by the venerable and possibly senile John Peel the other day on his BBC Radio 1 show and generated "the biggest reaction since I first played God Save the Queen by the Sex Pistols." The hamster record will be released Monday and everyone in Britain will buy a copy and then there will be big debates in Parliament about these hamsters.

OK. But here's why the Brits are really dumb: the number one record, currently, the one that everyone is worried that the hamsters will knock off its spot on the charts, is by Cliff Richard.

Only in England could there be a big controversy involving hamsters and Cliff Richard. London bookmakers are even taking bets on the matter. The Cuban Boys are 10-1 longshots to take over the number one selling spot, with some other stupid Limey band called Westlife 4-7 favorites to get there first.

Also there is a stupid dance craze in England now based on the stupid dancing hamsters. Freaks.

Over.  End of Story.  Go home now.

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