Build Date: Wed May 21 18:20:18 2025 UTC
I'm gonna use this Model M until it drives all my coworkers INSANE.
-- Mr. Bad
Walken Super Dance
2001-07-05 16:24:14
Christopher Walken launches his music video career.
Most people are familiar with Christopher Walken's multifarious portrayals of exceedingly bad people. Who would ever forget Mr. Smith in Nick of Time, repeatedly punching Johnny Depp in the stomach (and giving him a good pistol whipping too), and "Hickey," in Last Man Standing, a scowling monster-man with a Tommy Gun; and of course the evil arch-angel Gabrial, in the Prophesy series -- a roll that Walken seemed born to play ("I'm an angel. I kill newborns while their mamas watch...."). But many people are not familiar with Walken's earlier career as a crazy song-and-dance-man on Broadway!
Imagine Christopher Walken -- then known as Ronnie Walken -- wearing a white Victorian wig and belting out showtoons. Terrifying! But I've seen pictures of it, so it must be real!
Every so often the song-and-dance-man-side of Walken seems to slip out. I saw him on the David Letterman show, and when Letterman made the mistake of teasing him about his Broadway shows, A devilish look swept across Walken's face, and he started singing a filthy sea shanty! And he wouldn't stop. Letterman had to cut to a commercial break because the sailor obscenities were flying out faster than the censors could bleep them. Terrifying!
Now it seems that Walken's dancing roots occasionally resurface too. There's a new FatBoy slim video, directed by Spike Jones, and starring Christoper Walken. This has got to be the best combination since the Abel Ferrara + Christopher Walken + Chris Penn == The Funeral. Except this time the result is really good! The Funeral was a little boring, which seems impossible, but also true...
Indeed, this video is so good that people everywhere will put on suits and go dance in hotel lobbies throughout the land. Christopher Walken even flies around like in Crapping Tiger Grouchy Dragon!
T O P S T O R I E S
California Glory Hole attracts huge crowds
A glory hole at Napa's Lake Berryessa is drawing huge crowds. According to Chris Lee, the general manager for the Solano County Water Agency, the glory hole hasn't been active since 2019, and only restarted operations on Feb 4. (More...)
Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
Republican State Senator Justin Eichorn of Minnesota was arrested for soliciting a teen girl on Monday just hours after he introduced a bill proposing "Trump derangement syndrome" (TDS) as a form of mental illness. (More...)
Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
The parents of a Texas girl who died from the measles are defending their decision not to vaccinate their daughter. "She says they would still say 'Don't do the shots,'" an unidentified translator for the parents said. "They think it’s not as bad as the media is making it out to be." (More...)
Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
"I'm mayor now" said write-in mayoral candidate and founder of Pirate’s Booty Snacks Robert Ehrlich after losing the election for Mayor of Sea Cliff, NY. Then he tried to take over the Village Hall and fire everyone. (More...)
Musk claims Xitter security is staffed by idiots
Earlier this month Xitter experienced a massive outage. In an interview, Musk told Fox Business that he believes the attack came from "IP addresses originating in the Ukraine area." (More...)
The Future Ain't What It Used To Be
Ideas have taken horrifying shape and rooted into our modern reality. (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
I just came across this coolio essay by Pigdog Journal Science Editor binky wedged between two staves in the back corner of the submissions barrel. It's on the origin of the cyberbilly and is definitely de rigeur for any serious student of this fascinating sociological movement. (More...)
Put the "Life" Back in SF "Nightlife"
The Man is putting the hurting on San Francisco clubs, but some people are fighting back. Beajolais! Flesh interviews Leslie Ayers of the San Francisco Late Night Coalition. (More...)
Experimenter is a film released in 2015 starring Peter Sarsgaard. It tells the story of Dr. Stanley Milgram's life, including the infamous Milgram electric shock experiment, tests on crowds, and his work developing a theory on the mechanics of social networks. It currently streams on Netflix. (More...)
It was the night of the Leonid meteor showers -- the perfect opportunity to break out the evil opaline liquor, get madder than hatters, and test wireless ethernet hardware... Would the plunging meteorites interfere with the 2.4GHz band? What about our delicate brain waves? (More...)
Skunk School -- Learn Why Not To Keep Skunks As Pets
There is an alarming trend in pet purchasing habits this fall. People inspired by the WWII film, "Life is Beautiful" -- the one with that annoying Italian guy -- are buying descented skunks by the millions. (More...)
Ratsnatcher gets HOT HOT HOT in this classic road tale that looks at the steamy underworld of Bay Area Linux advocacy. Loosen your collar for this one! (More...)
