Build Date: Fri Aug 7 00:40:15 2026 UTC
I am not Leonard Nimoy
-- Spock
It's 4/20! Smoke Em if You Got Em!
2000-04-20 17:57:17
So, here's my big conspiracy theory that I just made up: why do so many baddy-bad things seem to keep happening on April 20th? Hmm? Why? The Waco fire, the Oklahoma City bombing, the little disturbance in Littleton -- what's the CONNECTION!?
I'll tell you what the connection is: the MAN is trying to keep us DOWN. All those horrible things are just a big distraction by the PHEDS to try and make people associate FIRE, MURDER, BLOOD and DESTRUCTION with the most wonderful of pothead celebrations, FOUR-TWENTY DAY.
4/20 (just like 4:20, get it?) is this kind of fabulous spontaneous holiday that serious pot smokers take real serious. It's not about self-righteous speeches and medical mari-joo-wanna and all that kind of boring stuff. It's about going to SAN FELIPE or PISMO BEACH with a bunch of other stoneheads in your VAN and taking MONSTER BONG HITS until your hands and feet fall off because you're just way too high. Now THAT is a holiday, my friends! No two ways about it!
OK, that conspiracy theory is pretty much not true. But it sounds good. Anyways, who wants to get all SADDY-SAD and retrospective and shit on 4/20 when you could go out and smoke some BIG GOBS of HASHISH with your friends instead!? What kind of choice is that? No choice at all, I say! Go smoke! Go! Go!
T O P S T O R I E S
John Dvorak has passed. I’m of mixed emotions. First off I’m more positive about his contribution to the overall technology journalism of the early PC days through the 90s, despite how many things he got wrong. He was a firebrand and commanded attention. (More...)
America's National Recording Registry Inducts Culturally Significant Artist - Weezer!
America's Library of Congress calls them "defining sounds of history and culture" and "audio treasures worthy of preservation for all time based on their cultural, historical or aesthetic importance in the nation’s recorded sound heritage." Ladies and gentlemen, I give you... Weezer! (More...)
The Crossroads are real and The Blues is a place; The enduring myth of Robert Johnson (More...)
California Glory Hole attracts huge crowds
A glory hole at Napa's Lake Berryessa is drawing huge crowds. According to Chris Lee, the general manager for the Solano County Water Agency, the glory hole hasn't been active since 2019, and only restarted operations on Feb 4. (More...)
Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
Republican State Senator Justin Eichorn of Minnesota was arrested for soliciting a teen girl on Monday just hours after he introduced a bill proposing "Trump derangement syndrome" (TDS) as a form of mental illness. (More...)
Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
The parents of a Texas girl who died from the measles are defending their decision not to vaccinate their daughter. "She says they would still say 'Don't do the shots,'" an unidentified translator for the parents said. "They think it’s not as bad as the media is making it out to be." (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
NASA's Mars missions keep blowing up and crashing, but dammit, when you reach for the stars you have to expect a few minor setbacks. Drink a toast to the men and women of NASA! Toast them with a Lost Probe mixed up with your own two (or three) hands! (More...)
On the Implementation of a Grocery Bag And Overforestation Initiative
Patient Joab and his evil cohort, Patient Steve, develop a proposal for the plastic-v.-paper problem that EVERYONE can be happy with. An EXCLUSIVE from Spock Mountain Research Labs! (More...)
What do Computers and Skateboards have in Common?
They both sprang from the mind of John Mauchly that's what. (More...)
Johnny Royale loves his Trackman ultra pointer thingy. It's coolio! Read all about it! (More...)
A Day in the Life of a Beverotologist
It was starting to look like a very boring Saturday, trapped as I was in the suburban wastelands of the outer Bay Area, so I called my Able Assistant (AA) and proposed that we perform some Spocktail field tests. For some time I've been working on creating the quintessential cinematic beverage and even tho' SMRL does most of its testing during nocturnal hours, this seemed an opportune time to roll up the sleeves of our labcoats and get some science done. While the beverotology creation tested this day (The Neurotoxin) must be deemed a success, this article focuses more the journey of the experimenters, rather then the science of beverotology. (More...)
Ratsnatcher gets HOT HOT HOT in this classic road tale that looks at the steamy underworld of Bay Area Linux advocacy. Loosen your collar for this one! (More...)
