Another Spocktail brought to you by the selfless beveratologists of Spock Mountain Research Labs. You do the math, we'll do the SCIENCE!

This week's Spocktail of the Week -- and MAN, if that isn't the biggest misnomer ever, I dunno what is -- is called the Week Between. That's because it's optimized for the week between Xmas and New Years', that kind of dead zone of holiday fun shoehorned between office-party eggnog and large quantities of celebratory shom-pan-yah. This is a time that lacks sufficient alcohol consumption -- a condition that's intolerable to any beveratologist. I mean really.

The problem with this week is that most people end up having to go to work, but don't really have anything to do. There's just not a lot going on this week. So the Week Between kind of fills the void and provides a pleasant diversion from overplay of Zangband at your desk or waiting in line at the Macy's return counter.

I first had a Week Between while working for the Anderson Valley Advertiser as a cub reporter on the International Business desk. Basically, I was paid $25/week to track overseas sales of Boontling dictionaries, second-rate wine and bushels of sweet green bud to Hong Kong cartels and Greek shipping agencies.

My editor was a crusty 75-year-old bastardo with gigantic gray eyebrows who wore tie-dye suspenders and claimed to be in secret communication with Thomas Pynchon. He kept the mixings for Week Betweens in the top left-hand drawer of his desk, right under the bucky walter.

During this dead time we'd sit in his office drinking Week Betweens and he'd harangue me about the Bulgarian Gnostic sects who kept outposts in the area and made signal bonfires on the beach. Once I was completely wasted, I'd go back to my apartment over the feed store in Philo and make up another set of ganja import-and-export tables.

Anyways, here's the recipe for a Week Between. Enjoy!

Ingredients:

• 1-1/2 oz vodka
• 1-1/2 oz corn whiskey
• 1/8 tsp. French mustard
• 1/8 tsp. hempseed oil
• dash bitters
• 2 pearl onions

Directions:

In a highball glass, mix mustard and hempseed oil. Add vodka and whiskey, then bitters. Garnish with pearl onions.

uzerboozer@pigdog.org