Build Date: Thu Dec 11 09:00:16 2025 UTC
Something. YOU KNOW I HAVE A POINT YOU BASTARD!!!@!+++ATH+++NO CARRIER
-- Mr. Bad
Horrible Misogynistic Porn Poem
1999-06-26 19:32:15
Check out this porn poem! It's real gross! You'll go "Ewww!" And it's ONLY ON PIGDOG.
Sonnet to Jelly Donut and Washington Monument
by Miles
Standish
My thick-veined slab of beef will call my name,
And choke out pearly
gobs to voice its wish:
To spasm randomly, while plunging through
Your
squirting swamphole, ripe with musk of fish.
Your axe-wound calls to me, as
if with teeth,
And heavy twist my eggs with sweaty need:
To slam
together skins with slimy force!
To lose the bitter sludge that is my
seed!
My purple-helmet warrior cannot wait
To taste your coozebag flesh
and taco lips
While bone finds warm embrace in steaming gash,
And
violent screams keep time with grinding hips.
But if these things should
not yet come to pass,
Then I shall be content to take your ass.
T O P S T O R I E S
The Crossroads are real and The Blues is a place; The enduring myth of Robert Johnson (More...)
California Glory Hole attracts huge crowds
A glory hole at Napa's Lake Berryessa is drawing huge crowds. According to Chris Lee, the general manager for the Solano County Water Agency, the glory hole hasn't been active since 2019, and only restarted operations on Feb 4. (More...)
Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
Republican State Senator Justin Eichorn of Minnesota was arrested for soliciting a teen girl on Monday just hours after he introduced a bill proposing "Trump derangement syndrome" (TDS) as a form of mental illness. (More...)
Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
The parents of a Texas girl who died from the measles are defending their decision not to vaccinate their daughter. "She says they would still say 'Don't do the shots,'" an unidentified translator for the parents said. "They think it’s not as bad as the media is making it out to be." (More...)
Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
"I'm mayor now" said write-in mayoral candidate and founder of Pirate’s Booty Snacks Robert Ehrlich after losing the election for Mayor of Sea Cliff, NY. Then he tried to take over the Village Hall and fire everyone. (More...)
Musk claims Xitter security is staffed by idiots
Earlier this month Xitter experienced a massive outage. In an interview, Musk told Fox Business that he believes the attack came from "IP addresses originating in the Ukraine area." (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
This is one for the Ages. Our new signature SMRL drink. We beta tested this several weeks ago at the Goat Brothers B-Day Party. Oh my! (More...)
Our team of crack journalists went insane, and made the drive from Concord, California to Concord, New Hasmpshire on Interstate 80. Read the insightful observations of our intrepid travelers made on their journey into the heartland. (More...)
It was early in May last year when I first heard about Spock Mountain Research Labs. I was working on a story about a Hungarian scientist's new approach to nucleopeptide synthesis when I got a call from my friend Albert. (More...)
Brother Wayne Lays Down the Truth
Flesh interviews Wayne Kramer of MC5. (More...)
The quest for knowledge never ends at the super top secret Spock Mountain Laboratory, although it is frequently interrupted by beverage breaks. Recently, a team of crack ethnomixologists returned from a dangerous expedition to the frozen expanse of Canada with the much sought recipe for a Spocktail that is destined to replace blunt force head trauma as the major cause of brain damage in the civilized world. (More...)
A Nobel Prize-Winning Author Describes Liquor
Curled up cozy with a good book? All warm and snuggly and thinking about friends far away? So am I, reading the greatest story by the greatest writer -- when he suddenly starts waxing philosophical about liquor! (More...)
