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Aw Fuck. It's That Time Of The Year Again
1999-12-13 13:58:11


Sappy Christmas Shit
 
EVERYTHING IS BETTER IN THE ASS. Cocaine, wine, coffee, nitrous (supposedly quite dangerous), sushi, "Little Mermaid" DVDs, cat food, Forth: EVERYTHING is better if you put it in your ass. Everything!
-- The Mighty Silverback

 

Once again, you've found yourself with a holiday shopping list a mile long. You have no idea what to get for anyone, and all the stores are packed with shoppers with a staving piranha mindset! May we suggest that you let The Stranger be your guide?

Once again, America's finest free paper, The Stranger, has released their annual Christmas gift guide. And as usual, it is heads and tails above all of the others, offering helpful suggestions for the people in your life. This year's categories coverů

  • GIFTS FOR THE UNEMPLOYED
  • GIFTS FOR PEOPLE YOU DON'T LIKE
  • GIFTS FOR PEOPLE WITH POOR JUDGMENT
  • GIFTS YOU CAN BLOW
  • GIFTS FOR THE PARANOID
  • GIFT FOR THE DEATH ROW INMATE
  • GIFTS FOR THE MORBID
And many more categories.

No doubt, with their aid, you will be able to find the perfect gift for that hard-to-shop person in your life

Over.  End of Story.  Go home now.

ozzyluvr@pigdog.org


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