I want to kill bugs, sir!

     
 

Bin Laden Hybrid SUV
2005-06-21 17:28:55


Pao Tzu: On The Beat
 
Black magic operates most effectively in preconscious, marginal areas. Casual curses are the most effective.
-- William S. Burroughs

 

Car technology reaches a new height with the introduction of the fuel efficient, two-seater, Bin Laden Hybrid SUV.

Bin Laden - the accidental hero of hybrid vehicles.

The new Bin Laden hybrid SUV - the dream of a nation hell bent on oil drilling. Standard features include: Impact-Absorbing Daisy-Cutter Resistant Armor Plating, Satellite-Rejecting Black-Tinted Glass, Roof-Mounted Kalashnikovs, Remote Laser Detection System, Sprewells, Driver's and Front Passenger Side RPGs, Automatic Climate Control with Nerve Gas Filtration System, Betamax Video Production System, PGP Encrypted Short Wave Radio, and much more to choose from.

Why waste fuel in the middle of nowhere when you can hide in comfort from sophisticated intelligence operations in your new Bin Laden Hybrid SUV? Every model includes side-door essentials bins containing everything you need: pilot licenses, thermite, Pakistani subterreanean maps, skittles, even $5,000,000,000 in American debt!

Act now and you can take advantange of a low percentage finance program that gives you access to automatic weapons, insurgents, CIA intelligence briefings, and much much more.

Over.  End of Story.  Go home now.

cabin@pigdog.org


comments powered by Disqus
 
     

 

T O P   S T O R I E S

Sing Us This Song, Piano Man
by Flesh

Giant Space Penises
by Baron Earl

Ted Nelson's Junk Mail
by Baron Earl

Slap Kirk!
by Baron Earl

03-30

Flesh

Alex Jones Admits To Being Psychotic.

03-30

Flesh

Alex Jones Throws Temper Tantrum After Being Laughed At.

03-30

Flesh

So what's the time? It's time to get ill! Alex Jones Smokes Some Kind. Gets Really Paranoid

03-23

El Destino

The Las Vegas Strip now has robot bartenders

03-06

Poindexter Fortran

University of California special collections: now with more Hunter S. Thompson

02-15

Baron Earl

Amazing hand-stitched scenes from DUNE

01-17

Baron Earl

Contributions to Top Dark Money Spenders

01-11

Baron Earl

CES claims dildo is not a robot

01-11

Baron Earl

Rep. Steve King wonders how the phrase "white supremacist" became "offensive"

09-29

El Destino

Zeitgeist's Legendary 'Tamale Lady' Dies Just Weeks Before Opening Her Long-Awaited Restaurant

More Quickies...