Build Date: Wed May 21 12:50:39 2025 UTC
Real happiness, in politics, is a wide-open hammer shot on some poor bastard who knows he's been trapped, but can't flee.
-- HST
Net Flotsam
2001-10-19 01:07:22
A lot of humorous stuff rolled in off the web today and since I'm tired of looking that feature about the Free Dimtry Hearing on September 24th I'd thought I'd smash them all together sort like they do on Slashdot every once in a while and see how it goes. Enjoy.
Canadia
Frigate
Canadia Infantry
Canadia Airforce
First Afghan Missile
AFGHAN TV GUIDE
MONDAYS
7:30 PM - I Dream of Fatima
8:00 PM - Husseinfeld
8:30 PM - Mad About Everything
9:00 PM - Suddenly Sanctions
9:30 PM - The Brian Benben Bin Laden Show
10:00 PM - Allah McBeal
TUESDAYS
7:30 PM - I Love Sheep
8:00 PM - Wheel of Terror & Fortune
8:30 PM - The Price Is Right If Osama Says It's Right
9:00 PM - Children Are Forbidden From Saying The Darndest Things
9:30 PM - Afghanistan's Wackiest Public Execution Bloopers
10:00 PM - Buffy - The Yankee Imperialist Dog Slayer
WEDNESDAYS
7:30 PM - Talibantubbies
8:00 PM - U.S. Military Secrets Revealed
8:30 PM - When Northern Alliance Attacks
9:00 PM - Two Guys, a Girl and a Pita Bread
9:30 PM - Just Shoot Everyone
10:00 PM - Veilwatch
THURSDAYS
7:30 PM - Hanging With Mr. Hijacker
8:00 PM - Matima Loves Chachi
8:30 PM - M*U*S*T*A*C*H*E
9:00 PM - Veronica's Closet Full of Long, Black, Shapeless Dresses & Veils
9:30 PM - My Two Bagdads
10:00 PM - Diagnosis: Heresy
FRIDAYS
7:30 PM - This Old Tent
8:00 PM - Movie of the Week Ali Baba and the Forty Thieves
8:30 PM - Khalid and his Camel
9:00 PM - Captured Northern Alliance Rebels Say the Darndest Things
9:30 PM - Achmeds Creek
10:00 PM - No-Witness News
T O P S T O R I E S
California Glory Hole attracts huge crowds
A glory hole at Napa's Lake Berryessa is drawing huge crowds. According to Chris Lee, the general manager for the Solano County Water Agency, the glory hole hasn't been active since 2019, and only restarted operations on Feb 4. (More...)
Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
Republican State Senator Justin Eichorn of Minnesota was arrested for soliciting a teen girl on Monday just hours after he introduced a bill proposing "Trump derangement syndrome" (TDS) as a form of mental illness. (More...)
Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
The parents of a Texas girl who died from the measles are defending their decision not to vaccinate their daughter. "She says they would still say 'Don't do the shots,'" an unidentified translator for the parents said. "They think it’s not as bad as the media is making it out to be." (More...)
Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
"I'm mayor now" said write-in mayoral candidate and founder of Pirate’s Booty Snacks Robert Ehrlich after losing the election for Mayor of Sea Cliff, NY. Then he tried to take over the Village Hall and fire everyone. (More...)
Musk claims Xitter security is staffed by idiots
Earlier this month Xitter experienced a massive outage. In an interview, Musk told Fox Business that he believes the attack came from "IP addresses originating in the Ukraine area." (More...)
The Future Ain't What It Used To Be
Ideas have taken horrifying shape and rooted into our modern reality. (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
The Deep Dark Underbelly of the Star Wars Myth, or Ramayana Remembered
It's a fact: Star Wars is a blatant plagiarism of an ancient Asian legend, and the long lines of devout Star Wars freaks are really unscrupulous Asian copyright busters. From Indonesia to Thailand to Nepal, videos are available for sale or rent before they're even released in the US and UK due to this nerdy camcorder-clutching bunch. (More...)
The Innocent San Francisco Mule
Flesh and Abby have moved to an isolated rural location in the United States - equipped only with their sense of adventure. Recently they came down off the mountain briefly to file this report? (More...)
Poor Metallica. All they want is to continue to put out the same weak "Heavy Metal" they've been churning out since the "And Justice For All" days? and make gooey wads of cash in the process. The problem is, people aren't buying their bound for the heavy metal scrap heap, over-produced, uninspired, tired crap. And let's face it, their various commercial endorsements won't pay for the lifestyle they've become comfortably accustomed to. Resorting to lawsuits makes perfect sense, when you need spending money. But just one lawsuit isn't going to pay their bills. So, to aid Metallica, I've composed an open letter to the boys in the band, with suggestions as to whom else they might sic their lapdog lawyers on... (More...)
Ratsnatcher gets HOT HOT HOT in this classic road tale that looks at the steamy underworld of Bay Area Linux advocacy. Loosen your collar for this one! (More...)
A Nobel Prize-Winning Author Describes Liquor
Curled up cozy with a good book? All warm and snuggly and thinking about friends far away? So am I, reading the greatest story by the greatest writer -- when he suddenly starts waxing philosophical about liquor! (More...)
