Build Date: Sun Aug 31 07:30:09 2025 UTC
I hate this keyboard...as soon as I send this message - one piece becomes many.
-- Johnnie Royale
Chickenhead is Pretty Damn Funny
1999-08-20 14:53:12
Hey, so this chickenhead dot com thing, right? You know what I'm talking about? Well it's funny, eh? Pretty DAMNED funny, in fact, I will have you know.
"ChickenHEAD!" Just the name invokes memories of Mike, the headless Mexican chicken from DENVER who had no head! Serious, there was such a chicken! Somebody back me up on this, because El Snatcher told me about this chicken what had no head but still walked among the living. It was called "Mike," but it wasn't like it would come if you called. This was like in the 30s or 40s or something, but that has nothing to do with why "Mike" was a disobedient chicken. See, he had no head, like I said before, is what I'm trying to get across here.
Anyways, this chickenhead.com DOES have a head. It would be cool if they did this thing where it was the disembodied floating head of Mike the chicken, and the whole site was written from Mike's head's perspective, because I bet you that chicken head has some stories to tell. Wooee!
But even though they don't play up the 40s-headless-chicken connection, Chickenhead-dot-com has some funny-ass shit. Like, really funny. It's got really clever visual humor in the "ad" banners, and lots of good writing and clever articles. Also, they got this thing going on with downloadable desktop things, which the Windows crowd just EATS THAT SHIT UP. They love desktop wallpaper! And SCREENSAVERS! Don't ask me WHY, because I don't know.
Anyways, this Web watcher's prognostication is that chickenhead.com is gonna blow BIG, unlike other lame rags that will go unmentioned. So maybe you should check it out before it's all famous and sucky like the Onion. Or, uh, Suck. Or whatever.
OK, so, am I missing anything? No? OK, I think I said what I have to say. Go see Chickenhead was my main point, I think, and I've said that a bit. I also worked in a dig on Suck, which is just bonus. OK, I'm done now, go see Chickenhead.
T O P S T O R I E S
California Glory Hole attracts huge crowds
A glory hole at Napa's Lake Berryessa is drawing huge crowds. According to Chris Lee, the general manager for the Solano County Water Agency, the glory hole hasn't been active since 2019, and only restarted operations on Feb 4. (More...)
Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
Republican State Senator Justin Eichorn of Minnesota was arrested for soliciting a teen girl on Monday just hours after he introduced a bill proposing "Trump derangement syndrome" (TDS) as a form of mental illness. (More...)
Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
The parents of a Texas girl who died from the measles are defending their decision not to vaccinate their daughter. "She says they would still say 'Don't do the shots,'" an unidentified translator for the parents said. "They think it’s not as bad as the media is making it out to be." (More...)
Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
"I'm mayor now" said write-in mayoral candidate and founder of Pirate’s Booty Snacks Robert Ehrlich after losing the election for Mayor of Sea Cliff, NY. Then he tried to take over the Village Hall and fire everyone. (More...)
Musk claims Xitter security is staffed by idiots
Earlier this month Xitter experienced a massive outage. In an interview, Musk told Fox Business that he believes the attack came from "IP addresses originating in the Ukraine area." (More...)
The Future Ain't What It Used To Be
Ideas have taken horrifying shape and rooted into our modern reality. (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
Our team of crack journalists went insane, and made the drive from Concord, California to Concord, New Hasmpshire on Interstate 80. Read the insightful observations of our intrepid travelers made on their journey into the heartland. (More...)
Brother Wayne Lays Down the Truth
Flesh interviews Wayne Kramer of MC5. (More...)
WE'RE STILL TOTAL LOSERS JESUS
Mr. Bad, Tjames Madison, and various other Pigdoggers of all stripe take on the makers of JERKCITY in a PIGDOG INTERVIEW DEATHMATCH. (More...)
High Availability Guinness Stress Test
All too often we forget the incredible depth of technology behind the weekly ritual of TNiPN@*. We tend to only become aware of the strategy of High Available Guinness (HAG) when it rises to the forefront during a complete and utter venue failure. Yet we should all be super grateful that this system exists. (More...)
Vacationing from Somnambulant Narrow Realities
So about six months ago, I was chilling in Chang Mai, Thailand with ICBINJ, perursing the Bangkok Times over my banana pancake and Big Chang breakfast when I spotted this article reprinted from the LA Times. It was about some kooks from California (where else?) who were claiming to have been to the front lines in Afgahnistan in mid-December and had recorded the whole feat on their website. "Holy Fuck!" I thought, "Now That's web journalism. Who are these guys!?" (More...)
Poor Metallica. All they want is to continue to put out the same weak "Heavy Metal" they've been churning out since the "And Justice For All" days? and make gooey wads of cash in the process. The problem is, people aren't buying their bound for the heavy metal scrap heap, over-produced, uninspired, tired crap. And let's face it, their various commercial endorsements won't pay for the lifestyle they've become comfortably accustomed to. Resorting to lawsuits makes perfect sense, when you need spending money. But just one lawsuit isn't going to pay their bills. So, to aid Metallica, I've composed an open letter to the boys in the band, with suggestions as to whom else they might sic their lapdog lawyers on... (More...)